Owwy!!

Last night...I was doing my job. All was well. L Lady asked me for some assistance with a patient who is rather big . So I go and help her with this patient and in the process.........pulled something in my lower back. I actually CRIED out when it happened. LL looked at me with some concern and asked me if I was OK...........'Ummmmm yea...I think so' I say. I tried to walk it off...to no avail. N2 immediately told me to go 2 the Doc's..........I told her they don’t do shit cos they really don’t..........she replied " better than being in pain, which is what you will be here in about an hour." Turns out she was RIGHT!

So I call me lil bro.........he picks me up, (he was really concerned and I thought that was so cute) and then drops me at the ER. The Doc was sweet.........told me I pulled something (YA THINK!?) then proceeded to send me on me way with some painkillers and muscle relaxes. No Lifting, no pulling, no Yadda Yadda........been there....... done that.

I have hurt my back in the past.............several times...........but nothing like this.....I am actually walking like an old lady.

I am not HAPPY!!!

The biggest thing that pisses me off is the fact that I cannot work out.........that’s what really pisses me off............

and I wince every time I move my butt in the chair....

So I am heading off to work............to stand around and well..........hobble and yelp.

I should fit right in.

Ray

I just watched Ray (I know, I am behind the times here) and it was an amazing movie. Jamie Foxx's performance was mesmerizing. I have always been a RC fan, but after seeing this film it has only made me more so. So for all of those who haven’t seen it yet.....I really do recommend it. I also have 2 other flicks to blog about,Ladder 49 & Team America. TA sucked ASS!!! Those dudes need to stick with animation, but the fire fighter flick was really cool....maybe cos I am secretly in love with Joaquin Phoenix and have been since Gladiator & Quills.....yumm!

Moving on..

Really nothing to new to report. I am getting ready to hit the gym and then its back here to dig up 3 papers from my PCC days to submit to WSU for me writing portfolio, which I might say is a complete and utter waste of fucking time. I am a graduate and therefore, I must obviously have the ability to write a damn paper...........I even taught English for crying out loud....so for me to dig out this stuff, will be time consuming and well, irritating.


In other news.

Glad to hear that the deep throat mystery has now been solved, now maybe the government can get back to business.
Then again maybe not.

Don’t wanna fix somethin that aint broken...

Right?

slacker

I am such a slacker for neglecting my lonely 'ol Blog, but hey life happens and that’s the way the ball bounces.

I will update when I am not so flippin exhausted, I worked out like an Olympian, which BTW..... I am not!... and well…… I am paying for it now. Its the swimming, that kills me every time.............every single time. I now remember why my mom loved summers........she could send us off to the pool for 6 hrs of swimming and when we literally crawled in the door she was oh to happy to put us nighty nite, which is what I feel like doing right now.
But there is a West Wing Marathon on, a brother to feed and a cat to ..........well...........clean.......as she is filthy........

Again


See

Life just keeps me to busy to Blog..............

Right.

hangin

Its official,I am hungthefuckover!

I tried those chaser pills... and ummmmmm no, they do not work.... but you can’t blame one for trying. I truly don’t think they make a pill for idiots such as myself that have shots of well...7 different concoctions...........no I don’t think they do...had I stuck with beer....most likely I would
have felt OK today, but seeing how I didn’t.........

In other news...............I talked with someone last night and don’t remember a damn thing, bits and pieces, so I am hoping it isn’t as bad as I am making it out to be.

I do remember my brother walking out at some crazy hour and asking me what the fuck I was doing, I think that’s what ended the conversation.

So again I have broken 2 of my 5 drinking rules.........Never Call someone you are dating or were dating wasted, and never ever mix your alcohol...........

The other 3 were followed so therefore are not necessary to discuss at this time.

I am off to try and eat and curl up and die

Fun stuff

Melody of mind

This is my state of mind and heart today.


Song



Ask for More
McCain


Lying here with you, listening to the rain.
Smiling just to see a smile upon your face.
And these are the moments I'll remember all my life.
I found all I've waited for and I could not ask for more.
Looking in your eyes, seeing all I need.
Girl, I think you are it's everything to me.
These are the moments I know heaven must exist.
These are the moments I know all I need is this.
I have all I've waited for and I could not ask for more.

I could not ask for more than this time together.
I couldn't ask for more that this time with you.
Every breath has been answered. Every dream that has come through.
Yeah, right here in this moment, it's that we're all meant to be.
(Oh) here with you, here with me.

And these are the moments I thank God that I'm alive.
And these are the moments I'll remember all my life.
I've got all I've waited for and I could not ask for more.



I could not ask for more than the love you gave me
cos it's all I've waited for.
And I could not ask for more.

lag

I have been lagging with me posts here at the 'ol Blog as of late due to having nothing of importance to Blog about. I will say that I am feeling really great about mlyfe and all that is going on it as of late. My brother and I are getting along famously, as well as the rest of my fandamily. Work is going well and my friends here in Small-town are all groovy, great, and grand. So in that respect I am really happy.

I must admit I am finding myself missing the 'relationship' part of life. It’s been along time since I have been really in love, and I sometimes wonder if that part of mlyfe has played out its part. I hope not as I truly am a great romantic at heart, its just I have not been so lucky in love or with finding the right one. I have the knack of meeting someone and not clicking and then hurting them when the non-click turns into a ticking time bomb...meaning me saying how I feel and the reactions are those of a ...well.........explosion of emotions...that I dare say...do not handle well...AT ALL.

Tis my weakness..........and I wish I were a stronger woman in that sense of handling situations of that sort with more finesse and sensitivity, but as with all things in this short ride ...live and learn.

Moving on...

Star Wars was in a word AWESOME...

It is the best of the 3...I recommend it for all who enjoy Lucas and his StarOpera saga............really was a must see.........

Well I must be off.........I am dead tired. I just wrote and English paper for my brother's GF...she came over for my help and well.... I ended up writing the damn thing...wouldn’t you know it, it was on the topic of friends and once I started writing her a rough draft, well I basically just wrote the whole bloody thing...words just pour out of me at times...especially on topics close to my heart.


Speaking of heart...

Mine is lagging...tis tried...

Time for the must needed
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

sore

I have been hitting the gym everyday and paying for it everyday. I am addicted now I think....addicted to the pain and the endorphin rush i get....but I am working towards a goal......there is this outfit you see............you know the rest of the story.

Today I am off to see Star Wars.........I have heard it kicks ass and is the best out of the last 2.......I sure hope so....I literally fell asleep during the last one......and I aint one for falling asleep @ an 8 dollar event.........

I shall blog my review as soon as I return...........

music.

Carey
We Belong

I didn't mean it
When I said I didn't love you, so
I should have held on tight
I never shoulda let you go
I didn't know nothing
I was stupid, I was foolish
I was lying to myself
I could not fathom that I would ever
Be without your love
Never imagined I'd be
Sitting here beside myself
Cause I didn't know you
Cause I didn't know me
But I thought I knew everything
I never felt

The feeling that I'm feeling
Now that I don't hear your voice
Or have your touch and kiss your lips
Cause I don't have a choice
Oh, what I wouldn't give
To have you lying by my side
Right here, cause baby
(We belong together)

[chorus]
When you left I lost a part of me
It's still so hard to believe
Come back baby, please
Cause we belong together

Who else am I gon' lean on
When times get rough
Who's gonna talk to me on the phone
Till the sun comes up
Who's gonna take your place
There ain't nobody better
Oh, baby baby, we belong together

I can't sleep at night
When you are on my mind
Bobby Womack's on the radio
Saying to me
"If you think you're lonely now"
Wait a minute
This is too deep (too deep)
I gotta change the station
So I turn the dial
Trying to catch a break
And then I hear Babyface
"I only think of you"
And it's breaking my heart
I'm trying to keep it together
But I'm falling apart

I'm feeling all out of my element
I'm throwing things, crying
Trying to figure out
Where the hell I went wrong
The pain reflected in this song
It ain't even half of what
I'm feeling inside
I need you
Need you back in my life, baby

[chorus]
When you left I lost a part of me
It's still so hard to believe
Come back baby, please
Cause we belong together

Who else am I gon' lean on
When times get rough
Who's gonna talk to me on the phone
Till the sun comes up
Who's gonna take your place
There ain't nobody better
Oh, baby baby, we belong together, baby

[chorus]
When you left I lost a part of me
It's still so hard to believe
Come back baby, please
Cause we belong together

Who am I gonna lean on
When times get rough
Who's gonna talk to me
Till the sun comes up
Who's gonna take your place
There ain't nobody better
Oh baby, baby
We belong together

50

I stole this from someone who stole it from someone who also stole it from another who stole and...well you get the fricken idea.

For those who wanna know 50 weird things about me..


1. Your name spelled backwards. elocin (sounds like a prescription)
2. Where were your parents born? Mom was born in Missoula MT. Fuck my father
3. What is the last thing you downloaded onto your computer? Mariah Careys new song We Belong Together cos I like it
4. What's your favorite restaurant? Standfords cos its where Patti Anne and I used to do lunches and we had great lunches ;)
5. Last time you swam in a pool? O boy..ummmm ..I think when I went skinny dippen with the guys, but I'm not sure
6. Have you ever been in a school play? Yes a lot actually...I was in drama all throughout school.
7. How many kids do you want? elzilcho
8. Type of music you dislike most? RAP….although I like slim shady
9. Are you registered to vote? Yep, since I hit 18!
10. Do you have cable? Of course, why do you think I am the procrastination queen?
11. Have you ever ridden on a moped? Yes. I lived on one my entire 11th summer
12. Ever prank call anybody? Hell yea..big time
13. Ever get a parking ticket? Yes, in a rental. they never did find me...heheheh
14. Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving? Hell YEA!!!
15. Farthest place you ever traveled. Hong Kong China
16. Do you have a garden? No, but I had tomato plants last summer, pain in the ass
17. What's your favorite comic strip? Snoopy
18. Do you really know all the words to your national anthem? I think so
19. Bath or Shower, morning or night? Shower. Morning and evening..but I love bubble baths too
20. Best movie you've seen in the past month? SAW. I’m sorry I liked it!
21. Favorite pizza topping? Garlic chicken and mushroom, green peppers, red peppers lots of cheese and onions. Best served with cold beer.
22. Chips or popcorn? Depends on the mood and the occasion. Popcorn for movies. Chips for bedtime snacking..not so comfy on the sheets though.
23. What color lipstick do you usually wear? pink
24. Have you ever smoked peanut shells? Uh, no...
25. Have you ever been in a beauty pageant? LMFAO!!!
26. Orange Juice or apple? OJ
27. Who was the last person you went out to dinner with and where did you dine? My brother took me for a great steak @ Roosters.
28. Favorite type chocolate bar? Godiva or Twix
29. When was the last time you voted at the polls? I have been mailing mine in lately, but I think when I was 18.
30. Last time you ate a homegrown tomato? Last summer...my own homegrown tomtaers.
31. Have you ever won a trophy? I think so..yea...Basketball…woopdty doo
32. Are you a good cook? I am an excellent cook
33. Do you know how to pump your own gas? Well yea...jeeze
34. Ever order an article from an infomercial? No
35. Sprite or 7-up? Both
36. Have you ever had to wear a uniform to work? Yes. scrubs
37. Last thing you bought at a pharmacy? Vicodin.for me rib
38. Ever throw up in public? HAHAHAHA o god yes. sigh
39. Would you prefer being a millionaire or find true love? I would fall in love with a millionaire..JK..true love..$ isn't everything.
40. Do you believe in love at first sight? Yes. I have experienced it.
41. Ever call a 1-900 number? No.
42. Can exes be friends? Yes I am with a few.well.one
43. Who was the last person you visited in a hospital? My brother, in April
44. Did you have a lot of hair when you were a baby? Yep, I was a CUTE baby. I had a bunch of blonde hair. My mom said I had cwazy hair...still do..dammit.
45. What message is on your voicemail? Something along the lines of "I cant get to my phone so pls leave a message and I will get back to you as soon as I can..fuckers!" I joke. all of the above minus the 'fuckers '
46. What's your all time favorite Saturday Night Live Character? Gilda Radner..all her characters
47. What was the name of your first pet? Killer. I am serious. he was a lil white dog who was crazy.my mom called him killer.
48. What is in your purse? Wallet, celly, make-up, brush,pen(s), gum,chapstick, lighter, lint.
49. Favorite thing to do before bedtime? Ummmmm EG>...Eat. And watch TV
50. What is one thing you are grateful for today? My friend Pattie Anne. We talked today after almost 2 months of not talking...and as always my brother...he is a great guy

Pain/Gain

Who was it that said "No pain, no gain"? I wanna have a chitchat with that individual.

I went to the gym today and did a 2 hr workout............and I am feeling it now...I am sure by tomorrow I will be crawling out of bed.........I should have taken it a bit easier, but once I start I cant stop...I am like that with allot of things, most things...OK EVERYTHING!!!


In other events...I really haven’t done much today...I actually chatted with one of my former students from Hong Kong today...Daniel...that was nice...he was my favorite student, perhaps becos he is extremely handsome and charming, but more so cos he enjoyed my lessons and actually learned a great deal from me..............that was to be taken in an academic way...

No let me take that back. I actually did do something today.... shopped again...I went to Costco to buy a MP3 player/cd player so I can have some tunage while I kill myself at the gym and ended up buying more clothes and other items that I could have lived without.........that store needs to have a flashing banner outside its doors warning potential customers of the hazards that WILL be inflicted on their bank accounts if they dare walk inside...........or maybe one just for me.

COLEY YOU DONT NEED A NEW NAUTICA T-SHIRT OR A SPICE RACK OR A 10-GALLON CONATINR OF DIAL SOAP!!!!!

I think that may have deterred me from spending entirely too much $ on things I really didn’t need...

Then again............when someone tells me or warns me not to do something I tend to do it ten fold...so I really cannot win

I am my own worst enemy...


Aint I a daisy?

Quiz

I thought these were rather insightful......

I know they are mostly full of shit, but hey its raining and I am bored and its fun........

So there you go!!!


'sides, its all about ME!!!


;)

You Are a Life Blogger!

Your blog is the story of your life - a living diary. If it happens, you blog it. And make it as entertaining as possible.

What kind of blogger are you?

Your Birthdate: January 5

With a birthday on the 5th of the month you are inclined to work well with people and enjoy them. You are talented and versatile, very good at presenting ideas. You may have a tendency to get itchy feet at times and need change and travel. You tend to be very progressive, imaginative and adaptable. Your mind is quick, clever and analytical. A restlessness in your nature may make you a bit impatient and easily bored with routine. You may have a tendency to shirk responsibility

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

You Are 25 Years Old

25 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

Your Seduction Style: The Coquette

You are a pro at playing the age old game of hard to get. Your flirting style runs hot and cold, giving just enough to keep them chasing you. Independent and self-sufficient, you don't need any one person to make you compelte. And that independence is exactly what makes people pursue you.

What Is Your Seduction Style?

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved.

You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was insecure and in constant need of reassurance.

Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage something you've always wanted... though you haven't really thought about it.

In this moment, you think of love as something you can get or discard anytime. You're feeling self centered.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

Your Deadly Sins

Sloth: 80%

Envy: 40%

Gluttony: 40%

Wrath: 40%

Greed: 20%

Lust: 20%

Pride: 20%

Chance You'll Go to Hell: 37%

You will get bugs, because you're too lazy to shoo them off. And then you'll die.

How Sinful Are You?

You Are 55% Normal (Somewhat Normal)

Your Political Profile Overall: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal Social Issues: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal Personal Responsibility: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal Fiscal Issues: 50% Conservative, 50% Liberal Ethics: 0% Conservative, 100% Liberal Defense and Crime: 25% Conservative, 75% Liberal How Liberal / Conservative Are You? While some of your behavior is quite normal... Other things you do are downright strange You've got a little of your freak going on But you mostly keep your weirdness to yourself

How Normal Are You?

Your #1 Match: INTP

The Thinker You are analytical and logical - and on a quest to learn everything you can. Smart and complex, you always love a new intellectual challenge. Your biggest pet peeve is people who slow you down with trivial chit chat. A quiet maverick, you tend to ignore rules and authority whenever you feel like it. You would make an excellent mathematician, programmer, or professor.

Your #2 Match: ISTP

The Mechanic You are calm and collected, even in the most difficult of situations. A person of action and self-direction, you love being independent. To outsiders yous eem impulsive, surprising, and unpredictable. You are good at understanding how all things work, except for people. You would make an excellent pilot, forensic pathologist, or athlete.

Your #3 Match: ENTP

The Visionary You are charming, outgoing, friendly. You make a good first impression. You possess good negotiating skills and can convince anyone of anything. Happy to be the center of attention, you love to tell stories and show off. You're very clever, but not disciplined enough to do well in structured environments. You would make a great entrpreneur, marketing executive, or actor.

Your #4 Match: ESTP

The Doer You are adventurous and risk taking. You act first, think second. You love being the center of attention. Chances are you were the class clown. Competitive, charming, and charasmatic - you have your own code of honor. You live a flexible life, bouncing between a series of activies that interest you. You would make a great salesperson, marketing director, or entrepreneur.

Your #5 Match: INFP

The Idealist You are creative with a great imagination, living in your own inner world. Open minded and accepting, you strive for harmony in your important relationships. It takes a long time for people to get to know you. You are hesitant to let people get close. But once you care for someone, you do everything you can to help them grow and develop. You would make an excellent writer, psychologist, or artist.

What's Your Personality Type?

You Are A Realistic Romantic

You are more romantic than 60% of the population. It's easy for you to get swept away by romance... But you've done a pretty good job keeping perspective. You're still taken in by love poems and sunsets You just don't fall for every dreamy pick up line!

Are You Romantic or Realistic?

rain

The rain today was so hard......it...well it was just really hard rain. I watched it for awhile....I had forgotten how hypnotic the rain can be...........but after about 33.3 seconds of it I went and worked out. I guess I am not one to stay hypnotized by nature for any great length of time.

I really have no plans today........going to make BBQ chicken and do laundry.......I live such an exciting and amazing life.......

Oh Boy.......

Seems I'm not the only one who is in a state of normality.......I have read all me fave Blogs and pretty much everyone is infected...


Blogneumonia

Maybe its just a 24 hour bug.......

O my Goat

Apparently a man had been arrested for crimes against nature/cruelty to animals...I feel and truly believe they need to call it like it is...the man was arrested for Goat RAPE!!!

This man Antonio Coria, 48 has been accused of assaulting a poor 2-month-old goat and according to the farmer(s) he has been assaulting the other goats since last July. The farmer never had any proof that her goats were being molested other than the fact that she had seen a naked male in the middle of the night in her yard. Plus the fact that she had found semen soaked t-shirts he had left at the scene...
( UMMMMMM HELLOOO!!!???)

Here's the whole disturbing story....Ungoatmanlike Conduct

I really have no thoughts. well I do........one in particular


SICK MUTHAFUCKA!!!!!

needs a lil help........



In other news.....

I just watched Cat Woman and holy catshit wasn’t that a neto flick.......I was just amazed at the plot/character development/special effects/acting performances and overall superior film making...

I now know why I waited to see this wonderful film, so I wouldn’t laugh in utter disbelief in the theater. Best to wait and watch it in the privacy of my own home where I can mock it without interruption. It really is the Puurrfect film for those who enjoy cinematic torture.



Moving on.......

My brother took me out to dinner at a place called Roosters. I must admit I wasn’t to keen on eating at a place called Roosters, especially after reading about the GoatMan, but I have to admit that the food (steaks) were exceptionally good....better than good.......excellent. The service was fabulous as well as the atmosphere. It’s a lil place overlooking the river, and the local dock for sailboats and such. So one can sit outside and watch the sunset and have great food with great staff.....I was very impressed.......

Other than that I really didn’t do too much..........stocked up on groceries and tooled around me house for most the day............a nice relaxing afternoon.

I am now set to watch RAY ........I am pretty sure this film will be somewhat better than Halley Cats film.......

One can only hope...

Bloggen

So I am going to post the lyrics to a song .....as this is my state of mind today........

No need to write or try and articulate what I am feeling when one song is so definitive of my current mood.


Here ya go


Everyone falls in love sometime
Sometimes it's wrong
And sometimes it's right
For every win
Someone must fail
But there comes a point when
When we exhale (yeah, yeah, say)

[Chorus:]
Shoop, Shoop, Shoop
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop (yeah)
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop
(All you got to say is shoo be doop)
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop (Shoo be doop)
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop
Shoo Be Doo

Sometimes you'll laugh
Sometimes you'll cry
Life never tells us
The when's or why's
When you've got friends to wish you well
You'll find a point when
You wille exhale (yeah, yeah, say)

[Chorus:]
Shoop, Shoop, Shoop
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop (shoo shoo shoo huh)
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop (Sho0 be)
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop (Say shoop say shoo be say shoo be)
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop (say shoo-hoo say sho)
Shoo Be Doo (be doo oh)

Hearts are often broken
When there are words unspoken
In your soul there's
Answers to your prayers
If you're searching for
A place you know
A familiar face
Somewhere to go
You should look inside yourself
You're halfway there

[Repeat Verse 2]

[Chorus:]
Shoop, Shoop, Shoop (Shoo Be)
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop (Shoo Be)
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop (Shoo Be)
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop (Shoo-hoo-hoo be)
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop (Shoo be doop doop doop hoo hoo hoo)
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop (do do shoo be shoo be feels alright)
Shoo Be Doop Shoop Shoop (You can say oh)
Shoo Be Doo

Funny

A Joke I Swiped From Another Blog...



Clinton, Dubya and Gore are in a tragic plane crash and the next thing they know, they're standing before God, seated upon a blindingly radiant throne. God says to Gore, "Al...what do you believe?"

Al Gore says, "Well, I believe that I really did win that election. But for whatever reason, you decided that I was not destined to serve you in that capacity, and I have since made peace with it."

God says, "Very well, Al. You may sit to my left. Bill...what do you believe?"

Bill Clinton says, "I believe I did a lot of good, made a lot of enemies, and I was undermined by my own weakness that I should have been able to rise above. I wish to find forgiveness in my heart for those who sinned against me, and would hope that they likewise could find it in them to forgive me my trespasses."

God says, "Very well, Bill. You may sit to my right. George...what do you believe?"

And George W. Bush says, "I believe you're sitting in my chair."

boredom

Now that I actually have nothing to neither do nor stress about I am extremely bored.

Figures.

I am trying to fill up my time with workouts......but you can only kill yourself so many hours a day b4 exhaustion kicks in. I really need to find a car so I can boogie whenever I feel the need, which lately seems to be always.

Work is work. Home is home. Yadda Yadda......

I usually take off about this time of year for holiday, but with bills and such just isn’t doable right at the moment....

So I shall end this now.......I am off to get my weekly dose of TAN and do some much needed shopping for food products.......

On a good note

TGIF

;)

So I was watching the tube today and noticed that the white House was evacuated today.......seems a tiny lil plane was in the air space above the WH, which thus provoked the evacuation of the hose or house as well as the scrambling of fighter pilots to see who exactly had the nuts to fly in W's space...........this is the so called "2nd" presidential scare in the last 24 hours, as apparently Embarrassed Georgian officials were forced to admit today that a hand grenade was found in the Tbilisi square where President Bush gave a speech to a crowd of 120,0000 cheering people. The grenade was not in working order, so there really wasn’t a real danger nor threat to W.
I guess I am writing about this today as I have been noticing a decline in the so-called news in the media as of late. Seems we are more concerned with American Idol and MJ more so than what’s going on in the world today. It doesn’t help that the only thing being reported are theses stories so we as a public don’t have much of a choice, unless of course you use the Internet to search out and find "real" news. I actually prefer to read SCMP "South China Morning Post" or the London Times.....beats FOX or CNN.

Moving on..........

I went out last night and met the craziest character ....I shall call him "Ponytail Bob". ( no, he doesn’t have a ponytail, he is a prominent business guy here in the valley.....just seemed fitting after the stories he was telling me).

Anywayz...

He was a laugh. I was actually just sitting talking to asshole when he came and sat next to me... He seemed to think I was some grrl he had seen the previous Friday, after the initial mistaken identity was resolved we ended up in a rather funny and strange conversation..........I haven’t laughed like that in ages...........needless to say I didn’t give him my #, although I have his.........knowing me I will never call it.........I never do......I just collect #'s......safer that way...

I must be off to buy my membership and so some workout shopping......


Maybe the shopping will be my workout.

I am sure it will be

For my wallet.

acheivment

So I did it...passed all me classes...I am now officially finished with my 1st year @ WSU...

YES!!!

Now I can take the time to get back into things that interest me, like sleeping and sleeping. I joke. Tomorrow I am buying a membership @ the local fitness club as I get a great discount due to my being a student, so I am going to start focusing on the 'ol bod again as well as shopping for a car. Time to buy my own...as I will be taking courses on Campus in the fall.


That’s all I have 4 now...

Nothing to exciting..

cept for the feeling of overall satisfaction I have...and you cant beat that.........

No Sir, you sure cant.

Real

I just returned home from a night getaway...I am refreshed and feel anew...I feel as if I have taken a breath of fresh air for the 1st time in months...I am re-energized, like the energizer bunny.

My brother is in a good mood as well.... he just had a new CD player put into the car...perfect timing I would think as I just returned in the car from my getaway and would have liked having the tunes whilst I was driving, but it was nice anyway. So the car sounds great and all is well in Mr. C land.

I am waiting to receive my last grade for my English course...so far I have B+'s in all me courses...I am really pleased. Just think if I had actually tried and put forth all me efforts I would have had all A's baby, but I will settle for an above average grade, as I am... after all, above average..period.

So with this I shall end my entry. I am going to watch Saw...and call it a night. Tomorrow is the beginning of a new week...and I have my renewed outlook and I am ready to take on the week and whatever it may bring.


I sure hope its all good...as I really would like to keep this new real feeling alive and kicking.

Rejuvenate

Today is the 1st day in many days that I have felt neither the desire nor the need to Blog about anything. That last week of cramming and slamming a terms worth of material was a bit trying on me..........but I am recovering....slowly.

I am actually going to work out...a 1st in about a …..month……and trust me its showing..

Speaking of exercise........N2 and I are going to hit the gym together this summer.......seems Tantrum made some snide and crude remark to her ......which has set her off on the "I am SO HUGE" trip....which of course is not true........but when an ass of a man tells a grrl she looks obese...well it tends to have this effect...........so all in all...it will be good for both of us......I LOVE the gym.........but hate going alone.......and she HATES the gym....but likes hanging out with me.....so its a win win.

In other news.......well.........in my personal life.....things are fine. I have decided to leave out my personal life from now on........as I like to keep certain things between me and me. If ya know what I mean......

Ok then.........that’s all I got........hafta get a groove on.........

Coleyz song 4 the day

American Baby

Dave Matthews Band

Blahhhsss

I am finished with school........

So far I have a B+ in Biology and a B+ in my Psychology course........

Which is all good..........


What is bad is.........I am sick...feeling a bit under the weather......
I got the Blaahhsssss

So


I shall return when I am feeling more like meself....

Sorry

Journey
Send Her My Love

It’s been so long
Since I’ve seen her face
You say she’s doin’ fine
I still recall
A sad cafe

How it hurt so bad to see her cry
I didn’t want to say good-bye

Send her my love, memories remain
Send her my love, roses never fade
Send her my love

The same hotel, the same old room
I’m on the road again
She needed so much more
Than I could give

We knew our love could not pretend
Broken hearts can always mend.

(chorus)

Callin’ out her name I’m dreamin’
Reflections of a face I’m seein’
It’s her voice
That keeps on haunting me

Send her, send her my love
Roses never fade
Memories remain
Send her, send her, my love

song 2

Pretty much all I got..........

this is me

today.....



Candlebox

Far Behind

Now maybe I didn't mean to treat you bad
But I did it anyway
And not maybe
Some would say your life was sad
But you lived it anyway
And now maybe
Your friends they stand beside they watch you crumble
As you falter to the ground
And now maybe
Your friends they stand beside as you were flying
Oh you were flying oh so high
But then some day people look at you for what they call their own
They watch you suffer
Yeah they hear you calling home
But then some day we could take our time
To brush the leaves aside so you can reach us
But you left me far behind
Now maybe I didn't mean to treat you oh so bad
But I did it anyway
Now maybe some would say you're left with what you had
But you couldn't share the pain
No, no, no
Couldn't share the pain they watch you suffer
Now maybe I could have made my own mistakes
But I live with what I've known
Yes maybe we might share in something great
But won't you look at where we've grown
Won't you look at where we've gone
But then someday comes tomorrow holds a sense of what I fear for you in my mind
As you trip the final line
And that cold day when you lost control
Shame you left my life
So soon you should have told me
But you left me far behind
Now maybe I didn't meant to treat you oh so bad
But I did it anyway
Now maybe some would say you're left with what you had
But you couldn't share the pain
No, no, no
Now maybe I didn't mean to treat you oh so bad
But I did it anyway
No maybe some would say you're left with what you had
But you couldn't share the pain
I said times have changed your friends
They come and watch you crumble to the ground
They watch you suffer
Yeah they hold you down
Hold you down
Maybe brother maybe love I didn't mean to treat you bad
But you left me far behind
Left me far behind
Left me far behind

Update

Ok here is the scoop.

Yesterday I finished the hardest fucking Biology final I have ever taken in mylfe (MY life)...I had to sit through 7 hrs of lecture on DVD as I wasn’t prepared...as usual...afterwhich....... I took the exam. I believe I may swing a B...that would make me happy...Today b4 work and after I am wrapping up my essays on the environment...and tomorrow typing them up and sending them in as well as a final evaluation for English 355...after that I am FINITO!!!!

sighhh

I only have myself to blame...........for my procrastinational ways.........next yr I will be better......

Well that’s what I tell myself...

Yuck

Apparently an 84 yr old Thai man in Bangkok had an ear itch…..the itch had become so intense he had used cotton buds to try and relieve it, but he scratched so hard his eardrums ruptured and started bleeding. When the doctors went to examine him they found the reason for the insane itching. Seems around 50 maggots were making a nice cozy home in the mans ears……I shit you not….The Dr’s used tweezers and a suction device to suck the things out……and are holding him in observation to make sure he doesn’t become the 1st human fly….


Moving on……..

I am now going to start Biology……

After reading this………I am not so sure I wanna.
Maggot Story

S&C

Sex& the City on TBS is a grrls best friend.......

It is FABULOUS!!!

I so love that show........I am going to buy every season on DVD as soon as I can afford it........nothing makes me smile and giggle like that show.......it truly is a Godsend on a bad day........

Something else that makes giggle and smile like a school grrl is my new found friend Miss Ageless........she is FABULOUS too!

I am off to buy some coffee Ice Cream from Haggen Daaz
The 3rd thing that makes me smile......a pint of lovely H&G...

Tis Great!

Feeling Korny

Music fits my mood.......
I have mentioned this.....just a few times...

Seeing how I had a blow out with my brother.......

A lil dose of Korn seemed to be the best way to vent my frustration......

I recommend them to anyone who needs a good dose of an exceptionally talented aggressive ROCK band........

This song here.....I can totally identify with today........there are several more, but I am feeling selfish....

BTW
Korn Greatest Hits is an excellent CD.........a great compilation of good tunage.


KORN

"Did My Time"

Realized I can never win
Sometimes I feel like I have failed
Inside where do I begin
My mind is laughing at me
Tell me why am I to blame
Aren't we suppose to be the same
That's why I will never tame
This thing that's burning in me

I am the one who chose my path
I am the one who couldn't last
I feel the life pulled from me
I feel the anger changing me

Sometimes I can never tell
If I've got something after me
That's why I just beg and plead
For this curse to leave me
Tell me why am I to blame
Aren't we suppose to be the same
That's why I will never tame
This thing that's burning in me

I am the one who chose my path
I am the one who couldn't last
I feel the life pulled from me
I feel the anger changing me

Betrayed
I feel so enslaved
I really Tried
I did my time
I did my time
I did my time
I did my time
I did my time

I am the one who chose my path
I am the one who couldn't last
I feel the life pulled from me
I feel the anger changing me

Oh God, the anger's changing me

Grrrrrrr

So can things get any better in my life?

That would have to be a no.....Hell no!


I wake up this morning.....make my coffee and the 1st thing that happens is I have this HUGE argument with Mr.C.......over what else?

$$

He seems to think I owe him such and such...when I don’t.......

He then goes on to be a complete ass......tell me to change the situation seeing how I am so unhappy........yadda yadda.......I responded by telling him to change it.......

so needless to say we are not speaking........over $.

Such a joke........

Moving on......

I must now run and do the bank thang......pay some bills......and return here to finish me Biology assignments.......I will be so happy when I am finished with all of this.......as the weather here is beautiful.....and I sure wouldn’t mind being out in it today......would alleviate much of this stress......yes indeedy


In other news....

I got zilch!~

I get back to ya..

Knackered

I am finished with Political Science. I now know more about the Government than I did....well A lil bit more. I am glad I learned these new things.......but as with most of my classes, I will forget the bulk of the knowledge I have attained in the next 36 hours. Tomorrow is Biology day....as well as Wed-Friday......I am just glad I am finished........I have been going non-stop 'cept for dinner since 10AM..........I feel like a zombie and look like one as well........time to pass out so I can get up and start all over again in the morrow....................

So goodnight academic world…I shall return to defeat and conquer the Biology beast….

O boy.

Now I know I’ve lost it…



Oh and thank you for your comment Aussie……….

I am holding my own……….
Barely.

release

When I am stressed......as I am now with the tons of assignments I am struggling with ( I am 60.3% finished BTW) well........I throw on Motown......always have......it gives me release for some flippin reason, so for Coleyz song of the day I have chosen the following......


Enjoy.
and
Relax.



4 Tops
I need your lovin'

Baby I need your lovin'
Baby I need your lovin'
Although you're never near
Your voice I often hear
Another day, another night
I long to hold you tight
'Cause I'm so lonely
Baby, I need your lovin'
I got to have all your lovin'
Baby, I need your lovin'
Got to have all your lovin'
Some say it's a sign of weakness
For a man to beg
Then weak I'd rather be
If it means havin' you to keep
'Cause lately I've been losin' sleep
Baby, I need your lovin'
I got to have all your lovin'
Baby, I need your lovin'
Got to have all your lovin'
Empty nights
Echo your name
Sometimes I wonder
Will I ever be the same
Oh yeah, when you see me smile
You know
Things have gotten worse
Any smile you might see
Has all been rehearsed
Darlin', I can't go on without you
This emptiness won't let me live without you
This loneliness inside me darlin'
Makes me feel not alive, honey
Baby, I need your lovin'
I got to have all your lovin'
Baby, I need your lovin'
Got to have all your lovin'
Baby, I need your lovin'
I got to have all your lovin'
Baby, I need your lovin'
Got to have all your lovin'

Busy

So busy.
I have done an entire Web Project, or should I say a multi-media project for English 355 and I am still in the process of typing out 5 assignments for P.S.

I then have a Biology final to take tomorrow...as well write 9 summaries on the environment.

O joy......
I wanna die...

So 4-give me I most likely wont be updating anything of interest 4 a few days...

Such is the life of a college grrl on the verge of an emotional breakdown.

Kidnapped

Last night I was trying to concentrate on my studies. For the most part I was pissed. Pissed @ my Printer. It wouldn’t print. I tried everything......I did. looked in the manual. did the software checks......all of it...........the paper was going through, but once it came through the other end......there was absolutely nothing printed on the paper.......I was not happy. Then the paper jammed.........ok........now what!? I look into the printer.......and there.......where you feed the paper.....was my black hair scrunchie.......O gosh!. How did you get in there?...I had found the printing jamming culprit! I nabbed the scrunchie....tucked it in my pocket.......(for later use, of course) and printed a test page. 'volia!!!

Printing malfunction fixed..

After I had brilliantly fixed my printing malfunction.... N2 called me......she bought a new car.....wanted to swing by and show me......sure......y not? So here she comes....shows me her new 2004 Mazda......very nice ride BTW.....then proceeds to tell me I should accompany her to her house for Poker night........they do poker night every Friday night........I start to say n...b4 I can finish she says...."oh just for a minute.......it will be fun" I say "I don’t know how to play poker!" ( I know how to play strip poker, and I have never lost!).......anywayz.........she wont take no for an answer and nabs me. We then arrive at her house......and Willard and Israel try to explain to me the rules of Texas Hold em'......I ask for a book.........like the scholastic genius I am...so as to get familiar with the rules and such......Israel makes me a cheat sheet....which only gets ink all over me......he used a permanent marker which was permanently all over my arm.....ok… there were a total of 6 of us.......Aim her BF Tantrum, Nice Guy.,N2, Willard and myself.......we all sit and play poker......I did rather well.........made it to the last round.............when N2 decides to leave and visit her mother who had just returned from Las Vegas........”this family is full of gamblers I'm thinking”........so she leaves me......*sniff*...But....I do OK........then the boys want beer. I call N2.........she comes home with beer and mother in tow......mommy is wasted from her trip back from sin city........we then decide to go to mums pub..(she owns a pub).......so N2, myself, and mum all arrive at the pub......I order a beverage ...N2 does as well.....now it doesn’t take N2 much to become intoxicated........2 drinks and she is rubbing her face and making faces in turn making me laugh so hard I am falling all over myself.........well in the process of laughing…. this man.....BI GUY ....comes over and starts chatting us up. Seems N2 knows him from playing poker at another establishment...well he is a balding, no wait, he is bald.......average looking effeminate man........my gadar is just off the charts with this guy.......he is staring at me and then asks if he can join us........N2 who is pleasantly buzzed at this point says "sure".....I give her that "I am going to kill u look"...she ignores me......Grrrrr.......ok here he comes......sits next to me and begins asking me if I am in love.....as he would like to take me out sometime...........I ignore him...I was then rubbing my neck as I had a kink and he begins to rub it for me..........Willard and the gang had arrived by this time and he is just a laughing at me as I have this look of fear and confusion on my face......who said he could touch me? OMG!!! So I then politely tell him I am fine......he says OK HONEY...o boy........I then excuse myself.........he asks N2 if I am involved... she lied for me......thank God.......as when I returned I told him that no I am not in love, but involved...with Israel!!! Israiel was all to happy to be nominated….big grin on his mug now……...... hey I lied....but can u blame me? BI GUY was a nice guy, but......not my cuppa tea...
So the night ended very soon afterward............all had fun.......and next weekend the gang and I are celebrating completing my first year at WSU.

Moving on........

I get up this AM....making coffee.......minding my own p's&q's....when I hear screaming from next door.........my aunts place..........I run to the back to hear Lyndy threatening KuntJoy with physical violence.......I am turning and heading next door to find out what’s what when in walks Mr.C.........he then tells me that Lyndy has hit Aunt L , knocking her down and giving her a shiner. I don’t care to hear anymore and immediately call the police. I am on the phone with them when I see KuntJoy out front on the phone with the police as well............after I make the report I walk out in time to see the sheriffs walking up with a machine gun "I am not kidding….a machine gun"....asking "Where's the Gun!!??"........what gun?............KuntJoy tells them he has it and not to worry but to arrest Lyndy.....WHAT GUN!!!??????.....Apparently after Lyndy hit aunt L she went and got her gun and was going after him........she wouldn’t give it to KuntJoy........it was Mr. C who convinced her to give him the gun....thank God.........as God knows what she would have done......turns out it wasn’t loaded, but still.......Ok......so let me sum this up........Lyndy is this 40ish yr old drunken loser guy that Aunt Glo has adopted as one of her projects. She seems to think she can fix him. Well he has been nothing but trouble since he came on the scene a yr ago......but Glo being Glo......she wont listen as we have all warned her he would one day physically hurt someone.........either KuntJoy or her............well..........I guess...unfortunately we were right.............as apparently he showed up at Glo's home this AM........intoxicated........and proceeded to start arguing with Aunt L.......she then proceeded to pack up her belongings as she was going to a motel.........when the altercation took place.........she said something to him........he hit her.......she is a 67 yr old women prone to heart attacks. (he’s a daisy huh?)...well this is when she grabs the gun and well.....i have divulged the rest...

The police hauled off Lyndy and all was well once again at my Dysfunctional families residence. I haven’t been back to see how everyone is doing. seeing how KuntJoy is back from treatment ( he made it a whole 36 hours this time........tis a record) I figure he can handle the situation.....

Wow.......

My life is never dull.........or should I say my extended family is never dull……this is why I am so as my fandamily says “anti-social”……..this sort of rubbish tends to make me want to stay on my side of the fence…indefinitely..


I do have something that is making me Grin like a shot fox.......its a under-down... type of a Prezzy.........meaning a nice happening as of late....

coleyzzz 

Song

Happy Earth Day!!
4/22/05
For those of you who don’t know what Earth Day is..........well it is a global holiday to celebrate the wonder of life on our planet, or something like that.....Earth Day Page

Moving on....

I am extremely eclectic with my music. Music is actually the best way to tell what kind of a mood I am in....well I have had roomies and friends tell me this on occasion.

So this is my state of mind today.....
I have always been a big fan of AL...more so as a solo artist than when she was in the Eurythmics .......her solo work is more......I don’t know........

genuine.


Annie Lennox

"Money Can't Buy It"

Money can't buy it... baby
Sex can't buy it... baby
Drugs can't buy it... baby
You can't buy it... baby

I believe that love alone might do these things for you
I believe in love alone yeah yeah

Take the power to set you free
Kick down the door and throw away the key
Give up your needs...
Your poisoned seeds
Find yourself elected to a different kind of creed

I believe that love alone might do these things for you
I believe that love alone might do these things for you
I believe in the power of creation
I believe in the good vibration
I believe in love alone yeah yeah

Won't somebody tell me what we're coming to
It might take forever till we watch those dreams come true
All the money in the world won't buy you peace of minde
You can have it all but you still won't be satisfied

Money can't buy it... baby
Sex can't buy it... baby
Drugs can't buy it... baby
You can't buy it... baby

Now...
Hear this
Pay attention to me
'cause I'm a rich white girl and it's plain to see
I got every kind of thing that the money can buy
Let me tell you all about it
Let me amplify
I got DIAMONDS...
You heard about those
I got so many that I can't close my safe at night in the dark
Lying awake in a sick dream

I believe that love alone might do these things for you
I believe that love alone might do these things for you
I believe in the power of creation
I believe in the good vibration

Sour

Recently I have found a new candy that I am having a love/hate relationship with. Altoids Curiously Strong Raspberry and Orange Sours. Now I love sour candy...ALOT.... I always have.... and these lil tinies are right up my alley...plus the lil tin they come in is rather nifty as you can save it for tacks or Advil...or whatever...anyway...I have been nibbling on.... or should I say sucking on... these sour A's for the past week as they are great at taking my mind off of smoking which BTW I am doing really well.... and MR. C has quit completely...the problem with my sour tinies is they make me grimace and squirm like I am about to start labor...and not only that...if you eat too many...which I do....they tend to make the top layer of skin on your tongue peel and patch...eventually falling off....which in all honesty is...... NASTY...first I thought it was only me ......but I seen N2 making my infamous face and asked her if she was eating a sour A......"Yea........I hate em!!" "OK...y r u eating them?"... "Cos I love the sour rush I get!!" .... YES!!!.......so its not just me......she also has the shedding tongue trouble.....so we both decided to quit cold turkey or seek help...."YES. My name is Coley and I am an Altoidaholic"...
Or forever keep our mouths shut for fear of someone seeing our handicapped tongues and running in disgust and fear......"THEY HAVE ALTOIDIDIS!!!!"

Moving on.....


Work was LAUGHS tonight.....at one point I had N2 laughing so hard she couldn’t breathe and I couldn’t see for the tears running down my face....we really do have a great time together.......maybe cos we HATE everyone...well not everyone...hates a strong word.....we just see things and people in the same light............also .....L Lady was present as well as the MDQ. We all had a great time......it was nice.....I left feeling like I accomplished something as well as the big grin I had on me face.....friends can do that to a gal.

I have the next week off......Lavender was nice enough to make sure that I did..... for my finals and such.....so that’s what I will be doing......time to put my nose to the bookstone and get er done.

I do have something to say.......well for me more than anything...I was reading my past Posts...and some of them I am proud of...but..... most of them I am not.........I wasn’t aware I had such potty fingers AKA mouth.....so I am in the future going to refrain with the profanity.....and try and write how I conduct myself day to day.........with a lil style and bit of class.........I wont stop with my nicknames and "lil's" or my other 'cute' methods of writing......cos I do act that way in my daily life......with my closest friends only.........but......this here Blog is just a reflection of me....not the whole me.........its a therapeutic way for me to vent and discover things about myself that I might not otherwise see..........

That’s all.

Ok.......

Oh and again........N2....thank you for the invite.......I will be going out with you and the gang next weekend......after my term is over..........although....... I wont be accompanying u camping.... and not becos you think I am a "Prima-Donna".......

I just don’t like cold.........bugs....cold.....bugs........

that’s all.....

nothing really....

;)

just keep our holidays indoors..........

room service and cable TV.

Works 4 me.

DeskTop

So I am posting AGAIN ..... I guess there are other more horrible things I could be doing......I am just a Blogaholic these last few days........perhaps it has to do with the fact I don’t have anyone to talk to....so I guess writing me thoughts down is better than sitting here talking to myself...although I have had some of my best conversations with myself.....

So I guess I should blog about what I actually got accomplished today......read a butt load about politics, took my LAST exam in my HS class......'human sexuality'....which basically covered homosexuality,mastrubation,oral sex,and why women dislike the missionary position...seems that most women feel this position has only one true benefit....the intimacy benefit,(kissing) but according to a high % of women the benefits stop there......Most men are considerably heavier than women and therefore they are having to support the bulk of their weight, also in this position the woman feels 'pinned to the mat' giving a woman a feel of having little or no control, which seems to be why allot of American men do like this position as they have all of the control. There are other factors to why women are not as apt to like the missionary position, lack of 'fondling' and other 'pleasant" touching bennies. I was truly not aware of the % of women who disliked this........so I thought I would be cool about shit and share my newfound knowledge....and for those who want to know ........the position that is favored by a high % of women is..........female on-top.......a lil tidbit for the fellas out there .....as this is what my college textbook says......just passing on me new-found knowledge......
And that concludes today’s segment of Coleyz Sex-Ed Lesson 101.

Moving on...

I have been playing with my Desktop setting today (in between my studies) and I am just in awe of some of the shit I didn’t know I could do. I feel like an idiot. Or maybe I just never tried to add more than my background imagery, anyways.......I now have several pics on me desktop of Angelina and Darren......they actually look kinna cute together, but beautiful people usually do look good together. Beautiful people doing beautiful things.

I am also not very happy.......well I am actually quite happy, but this lil happening isn’t making me feel good. My Kitty Cat Domino is shedding in a big way. Which is normal this time of year....she also has a habit of rolling in the dirt outside in the road. She has carved a small enclave for herself where she can roll and scratch herself. This is all groovy, great, and grand until she comes trotting into the house and onto my bed.....dusty paws and dirty furs.......not a good combo.....so in she goes with me to get her ( lately, nightly bath).....in the bathroom. She comes a running out looking like a drowned rat......but about an hour later she looks so purty and smells so nice. This is where my unhappiness comes into play. I love my cat....like most cat lovers do...allot.......and I love to hold her and pet her.....and this is where the problem comes into play......since she started shedding, I have started getting some kind of an allergic reaction to her........my neck gets all itchy and red......from where she lies....at first I though it might be from her getting bathed, but no I have had to do this for the last 7 months. The only thing I can think of is there is something in her shedding.........I don’t know........but until she is finished she has to be booted out..*sniff*....

She can sleep with Mr.C.....least she wont be alone....

I guess I wont have to bathe her now........seeing how she wont be cuddling my pillow and trotting her dusty paws in here anymore.........that’s one Bennie...

OH MY GOD!......thats it! I am now officially LAME.

Talking about my cat in a BLOG........I need therapy...or a good night of drinking and flirting to get me back to meself again.....

That's the plan Man.............

School will be done on................

lemme see

The 29th......

Then I will be Whiskey Bound baby!!

Look out!!


'sigh'
cat-blogging....Jesus,Mary and Joseph...what next......start talkin 'bout my tulips or some such shit......Lord.......

Why Not

I had someone email me about a Post I had written awhile back....Wanting to know where it was..I told him to LOOK IN MY ARCHIVES.....but alas......he couldn't figure it out.....or may I say....he was to LAZY to look for it...........so here you go buddie.......

I really don't know what the big deal is........
I thought it was rather insulting.....

:(::::::

ah well....
My invisible ass post

Quick

This will be a quickie. I am in the process of waking up...yes I know its 2PM, but it takes me a sec. After this long and streeeeeennnnnuuuuuoussss process… I must shower and start on these assignments................I can hardly wait, the anticipation is killing me.

Maybe it will. Then I won’t have to worry 'bout it no more....

Just joshing...

I do have a quick bitch today...people who call me celly and don’t leave a message. Knowing about caller ID… thinking they can just call and you will call back to me is just plain lazy. I need to know what it is you are calling 4.... cos maybe I don’t wanna talk bout that certain subject...or maybe your just calling to tell me to be somewhere at a certain time...or MAYBE that’s what VM is for...to leave one a message ...message...get it?

I know
Tis a petty bitch...but its all I got today

I must admit I am in a good mood today...

Might be cos of that new Aussie shampoo I bought...or just cos its a beautiful day. Either way

Is a nice day

Now I get to spend it with me nose in a book..........

YAY!

Cookies

I am getting ready to watch a DVD...BUT I had an overwhelming desire to blog just one more time tonight...I couldn’t tell you why.... whoever you might be....

Mr.C just baked me some chocolate chip cookies and now I am so full I could burst...seems to be the new norm for me...eat too much.... feel like death...then have a huge guilt trip and promise myself I wont eat again for a week...yea...that about sums up my consumage habit as of late.... see I haven’t been working out lately...with the rib injury ...which BTW has healed almost 97.3 %...and the stress from school and Mr.C's recent health issues...I just haven’t had the time nor the energy nor the drive to want to step myself into a sweaty frenzy. I do believe I need to begin anew tomorrow( working out) as I am not liking the lil pudgy in me mid-section ...no I am not liking it one bit.

So like I have always said...if ya don’t like it...CHANGE IT!!
Or CHARGE IT!.......really just depends on one's state of mind........

don’t cha think?

I do have a big fat Thank YOU to say to me Boss Lavender........she told me I could leave early....6hrs early actually......if I wanted..and well of course I wanted to.......who the hell wouldn’t?......well those who need the $ of course........anyway........I just wanted to take the time to tell her again that she is absolutely F-A-B-U-L-O-U-S!!......although.....I did tell her that on me way out the door...well I was actually skipping out the door........but no one actually seen me skipping...how utterly embarrassing that woulda been!


O and again .......THANK YOU Lavender....as she also let me have this Friday off....which actually gives me.....lets see........Friday thru Thursday off....

O HELL YES!!

So I will have absolutely no excuses for not completing my assignments....

el'zilcho excuso......


O and just one more thing......

I want to wish Kuntjoy the best of luck ....he is leaving tomorrow for treatment..28 days 2 B exact.........so I hope he does well and opens himself up to the counselors......I do have me fingers crossed for him......plus he will be in my prayers.......as I really want him to get well......I truly do....regardless of what an ass he can be.....

SO....
Good LUCK CUZ!!!

and with that

I am off

Sunset

Since I didnt have to work a full shift tonight...I thought I would take myself on a nice mental holiday.....and seeing how I am such a nice grrl.....I thought I would allow me readers to come along.....

Rush

Rush...that will be me for the next 10 days....Miss Rush........trying to get in all of those last minute assignments that I should have finished 3 weeks ago.........but alas...seeing how I am the queen of procrastination...it didn’t happen. It also didn’t help the Mr. C was hospitalized...no that didn’t help whatsoever...tends to distract one from her studies...........BUT I can and will do this...as I have played catch-up in one day in my past Portland college days............we used to wait.... my friends and I...until the day b4 all of our labs were due...we would all meet in the computer lab and work together.... about 5 of us.... on 13 Labs.........it would take us 12 hrs...and when we left we looked like we had been the victims of some crazy coercive interrogation tactics .......didn’t matter......the work was done and the mission accomplished...if I could do that I can certainly write 7 small essays on politics .........especially when it is a subject I find to be so interesting.

Although, the biggest bitch will be the biology exam I have to take.........as I hate biology.........I received a b+ on my last exam...so I must absorb some of the material...how I don’t know as I tend to catch myself watching the lint float in the air above me.........that’s how interesting I find the subject to be.

I don’t.


Mr. C has just informed me that I need to take him to his MRI on Thursday..........it is his last and final test to be put back on the LIST...he is pretty jacked, as am I. I hope all goes well...cos he really needs this to work out...we both do.


I must be off.............work beckons...........School beckons.............life.

Oh how I need a break...a holiday.... a NORMAL ONE!..... maybe I will take one after all of this insanity is over...........

I just might.


Coleyzzz CD pick for the day

robyn -robyn is here
Is an old release......but still a good one.........

Human Sexuality

I just took one of my last exams in Human Sexuality.... and wouldnt't you know it...I actually learned something. I mentioned here the other day about how one needs to be happy in order to offer anything to another in regards to a stable relationship...and well that was the jest of my exam today...that exact topic.


Example
The first prerequisite for a loving relationship, therefore, is a positive self-concept (good self-esteem).

I just love it when I am right about something that I had yet to even study...but in theory it really is just common sense.... although not everyone buys that. Which goes back to what I was saying b4...some individuals feed off of love in order to make themselves feel good about themselves...its almost a type of an addiction. Wait...

It is an addiction.

I guess I am rambling on about this as I found this to be extremely ironic...as I am in a similar situation...or was. I decided to just maintain a friendship with Shocker...as I would hate to lose that.

Moving on...

Has anyone else watched the Gotti's? O...MY.... GOD!......I am not one for reality TV...and as a general rule I don't really watch it...but it came on today while I was studying so I was pretty much just listening to it.... why would anyone want to watch a bunch of spoilt rich Italian teenagers run around like they own the planet?.......I don't know........the worst is the friend or whatever he is Robert.....I swear he is gay and the dreadlocks.........Pulleeeeeaseeeeeeee.....I have never seen a gay, whiney, Italian-dego snob b4.....and I have to say ........its not something I wanna do again anytime to soon.......

I am not prejudice against Italians by any means.......B4.......I used to only date Italian guys.......and only Italians.........I loved them...dark and handsome..yum.......but after a few yrs........I learned that I cannot take the famous Italian temper nor the famous Italian infidelity........

Mama Mia......nata fo me.........

I must be off as I have to finish another exam and start my web pages...........

OH
I did take some time to learn about track backs today and I am now officially a Tracky....meaning I am capable of pinging and being pinged...although I doubt very much that I say anything really worthy of the great and powerful PING.

But

U never know..........

Stranger things have happened.

Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.

Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.

Calazone

Tonight we had Calzone from Pappa Jon’s take-n-Bake and let me tell you son... that is one helluva pizza pie. I am so bloody full right now I don’t know whether to throw up and pass out or pass out and throw up........either or.....I am too full for color TV. Speaking of TV...I just finished watching Smokey and The Bandit.....now I have seen this movie a zillion times.....but every time its on I find myself watching it like it was the first time.......I think its becos of the car.....the Trans Am muscle car....as a kid it was my dream car.......I swore to high heaven that I would have one when I grew up...and well I did .....sorta........I bought a 83 Camaro with 350 V8,dual exhaust, T-Tops with aluminum wheels when I was 21. It was ..as they say.....a bitchin Camaro......I remember getting 3 speeding tickets the first week of owning that crazy -cool- fast car......o how I had fun in me Camaro.........but as all things......it came to a screaming stop when it was stolen and literally blown up.......all I got back was the shell......all black and charred........even my wheels were melted and gooey.......was a sad end to a beautiful ride.

Lets see....what else do I have to Blog about today.......nadda really..........spent some quality time with the little brother........he went out last night and was sporting a hellashish hangover....too many shots of Crown and other alcoholic concoctions of different sorts... I pretty much made sure he drank plenty of fluids and ate..........and listened to those famous words of " I am never doing this again"

Sure

uh huh


Moving on....


I have been sleeping rather well lately which is all good.....it feels nice to wake up after a nice night of sleeping.....although my dreams have been a bit crazy and weird. I dreamt about me mom and Shocker last night......not a good combiantion..me mother didn’t like Shocker....so the dream was basically me trying to stop a feud which, as in life........wouldn’t have been an easy task to achieve......I don’t know what the dream signifies, I don’t believe in dreams having any real meaning anyway.........but I am open to debate as I try and have an open mind about everything. Until someone can prove to me that dreams have any meaning sides that of ones brain spewing out random images and emotions, I will just chalk them up to ........well......being what I said.....A series of images, ideas, emotions, and sensations occurring involuntarily in the mind during certain stages of sleep.....
So there you go.....


I must be off and finish a part of an assignment I have been avoiding. This next 11 days will be a bitch as I am going to be playing major catch-up.

story of my semester.

Happy

I am using this today as a way to get out what I am currently feeling...well I use this venue everyday as a way to get out what I am currently feeling...

I actually borrowed this from someone's Blog today as it totally reflects my current mood...

Here it is...
The way I currently perceive me....
How I C ME


How I FEEL ME.....

Here I am......

In all MY splendor...


have you ever taken a step or two back and came to the most absurd realization that the person you think you are, is in fact a lie?

have you ever taken the blanket that covers your lies, your insecurities, your fucked up realities away and saw… nothing?

have you ever just wanted so badly to just be who everyone else can be. Live how everyone else can live. Breathe a breath at a time.

have you ever had someone tell you you look well, happy. And want to slap them for lying to your face.

have you ever said out loud that you just need to be alone. When in reality you are lonely.

have you ever wanted to just stop.

just, fucking stop.



Moving on........

I had another not so nice convo today with Shocker......so I asked NB for some advice regarding my current shocking situation......she told me I should walk away as there are more things about Shocker that bug me than good.......which I guess in a sense is true. I mean.......there are things that just simply BUG me so much that I literally want to throw the phone across the room 68% of the time we are chatting up my minutes. But the remaining 32% of the time things are pretty copasetic. Is 32% enough? I don’t know........I just don’t know anything at the moment. All I do know is that I am not happy. ......and when one is with someone or sort of with someone that should be one's state of grace shouldn’t it?

Happy.
Happy?

Do we really get happy from the relationship we are in? Isn’t happiness a state of mind? Doesn’t happiness reflect what we really feel about ourselves? I have always thought so.........I have never been one to rate my current happiness by the relationship I am in at any given moment. I have never looked to another to make me happy nor have I ever allowed myself to be someone's happy whore...I believe that in order to be truly happy one needs to like oneself ...then and only then...can one offer themselves 100% to another and be HAPPY in a relationship..........

So I guess I have answered my own question now haven’t I?

I am currently not HAPPY with mlyfe (MY LIFE)…..and until I am ……I am not capable of giving someone else anything positive. or anything that resembles a happy relationship.

I truly believe this is so blatantly obvious when Shocker talks to me….My UNHAPPINESS....I have even pointed it out…….have even said “Hey Shocker…..Why would u wanna be with someone who makes u feel like this…or.....more importantly.....one who DOESN'T make you feel like that….?”

Shocker doesn’t know…….well…not totally true...……..
Shocker plays the luv card……..but I have seen enough card tricks in my time to know when one should fold their hand…

And ask for a new dealer.

HeartBurn

Well I have heartburn and heartache.........not a nice combo......too many Chimichanga Burrito’s/Shockeroo ordeals….......

I feel a bit overdosed/overwhelmed ...a bit well-done/redundant..full-up/empty... all of which... are not good combo's.......

Obviously..

So work went as well as work can go. I worked with the Mormon Dancing Queen and Tissue...although Tissue left 4 hrs early leaving me and the MDQ to our own devices. We managed quite well as we kick ass together....but the poor MDQ was in a rather foul mood as he really dislikes Tissue.....she has a tendency of asking his opinion on topics that do not apply to our working environment.
For instance: One day she was working with him and out of the blue asked him if he thought it was odd or inappropriate that her husband masturbated if she hadn’t had sex with him in 3 days.....the MDQ was a bit shocked and taken aback as this came out of left field.....he calmly told her that he didn’t think this was an appropriate topic for him to comment on and he felt very uncomfortable discussing anything that had to do with her husband and his self pleasing fetishes.(I, myself had a few scenario answers for her question/dilemma, but as luck would have it she didn’t ask me.....I cant imagine why?)

I remember while he was re-living this horrid experience how his demeanor changed…. the MDQ is usually a very mellow, laid- back guy…with a very sweet disposition…. but when he talks about Tissue or if she comes within 3 FT. of him…he looks like a man possessed….it would be almost comical if you didn’t feel for him…..Tissue seems to have this affect on about 99.9% of our staff…



So ...ever since then the MDQ cannot stand her.... and I cannot blame him...Tissue is one of those people that just doesn’t get it...and I doubt very much if she ever will.........I mean who would just walk up to someone u barely know and ask them something so utterly personal? Who asks a guy co-worker this? Well… TISSUE does!...
Tissue needs to clean up her act...
If that’s possible…

Moving on........

I had a very odd convo today with Shocker.........I was sort of asked a question.......and I lied. I lied becos I don’t feel comfy with this whole situation......and I don’t like not being in control.........at all..........so I lied.......and I hate lying........but at the time it was all I could think of to do.......

OK......my PC is bugging me in a big way........it is way LAG.........time to clean it up a bit I think....

Time to clean up many things.......

Spring Cleaning has taken on a totally different meaning for me this yr.


Funny how that is......

then again........

Lasts

Stolen from The JagSpot


Last Cigarette: 12 hours ago (dammit)
Last Alcoholic Drink: Samuel Adams ( Tuesday Night)
Last Car Ride: Commute to work today
Last Movie Seen in Theaters: King Arthur
Last Movie Rented: The Incredible's
Last Cuss Word Uttered: She's a useless piece of shit (in reference to a useless piece of shit I am currently working with....... YOU WORTHELESS PIECE OF SHIT!!)
Last Beverage Drank: 7UP
Last Food Consumed:Chimichanga Burrito from COSTCO .....YUM!!!
Last Time Showered: This AM (I shower everyday...sometimes twice)
Last Phone Call: SHOCKER
Last Text Message: SHOCKER (but I don’t think Shocker has text) ;(
Last TV Show Watched: CSI Miami
Last Shoes Worn: White Reeboks...so comfy
Last CD Played: Queensryche Promised Land
Last CD Bought: See above.... also Operation Mindcrime and Hear In The Now Frontier by Queensryche
Last Annoyance: working with The Useless Piece of shit at work...YOU USELESS PIECE OF SHIT!!!
Last Disappointment: Zilla and Clogs... Portland
Last Thing Written: this
Last Word Spoken: Why didn’t he tell you!!?? (Conversation with me Aunt regarding why she was waiting for me @ work when I told Kuntjoy N2 was taking me home and didn’t need a lift) I guess that is more than one word..but o well....
Last IM: 5/8
Last Weird Encounter: hmmm...I have one about every other minute...when I look in the mirror...
Last Ice Cream Eaten: Baskins & Robins Pink Peppermint .... YUUMMM!
Last Time In Love: I still am........
Last Time Hugged: Miss Secretary @ work when she seen me...after I had been gone in Spokane with Mr. C...she luvs me...but hey...what’s not to love!?
Last Shirt Worn: My Tommy Hill* white tee w/ fluorescent green and pink PREP writing on it.....way fab!
Last Web page Visited: Hit the JAG Spot
Last Thing Lost: Keys ,Celly, Wallet and my Fucking MIND!!!...(Still have yet to claim that at the Lost & Found)
Last Regret: Being so dumb as to not know who my real friends are......or let me re-phrase that....... knowing that said people pretending to be my friends were never my friends...and are not capable of being anyone's friend for that matter......so basically.......wasting my time......on the phony bitches of P.O


Do I sound somewhat bitter?

NaH!!

Hot

In a word.....to explain last night.

HOT

yea.....and that’s all I am going to divulge .....

So Mr.C has no luck.......my mother would say that if it weren’t for bad luck he would have no luck at all............and that is as fitting as it gets with regards to him. Seems yesterday he was in another fender bender.........I mean this kid cannot DRIVE.......but according to him he can.......he is the best driver this side of Indianapolis.....BUT if u were 2 ask my family...well they would have a diff tale 2 tell. So my insurance company has already called me......so we shall see if they will even cover his stupid ass as I didn’t add him to the policy as his driving record is well.............tarnished just a tad??? a wee tad bit...........
that’s an understatement..........in a big way

I must be off to the 'ol jobola...........wish I would have slept better........I tossed and turned all night again..........but I was dreaming about someone..........so it wasn’t all-bad...........

Sleep

I slept
13 hours.....
Thank You GOD!!!

I think it may have been working with a hangover.....or the not sleeping in 10 days......hard to say.......but it may have been the exhausting discussion I had with Shocker.........I truly think that may have been what took me over the Zzzzzzzzz edge....


That conversation prior to me falling asleep....well that needs to be addressed here.....

We were getting along very well.........well.......in a good way.....so to speak.....

Then for some reason .......it all went to shit.....its as if we are not on the same page.....at all...........I don’t know what it is...........I do actually......there is a reason I am holding back.....one in particular and perhaps maybe I will share that with Shocker someday.....but not right now.......

I will say this.......

I do have feelings for you Shocker....very strong ones......they are just numb right now.....and I will explain that to you one day.......I care about you.....and I think of you .......all the time......you have shown me that I can love again......cos I really didn’t think I could......but pls understand that I am not in a place right now where i can share mylfe......with you or anyone........

If I were in that place.......it would be you.......and only you..



Darren Hayes
Light



The light, it flickers
Your light, travelling down so deep
Illumination

I have been cold, I have been blind
You have come to change my mind
I can put my faith in you

The light, it blisters
Your light, coming down so bright
Transformation
Turn it up, give me some room to grow
Turn it up, give me that sense to know

I have been cold, I have been blind
You were sent to change my mind
I can put my faith in you

For something ordinary
It's so extraordinary
I trust, I put my faith in you
In you
In you, in you
In you, in you

The light, it glitters
Your light, when I stand this close
It's almost blinding
Turn it up, give me some room to grow
Turn it up, give me the sense to know

I have been changed, I have become
I have flamed under the sun
I'm the reflection of you

For something ordinary
It's so extraordinary
I trust, I put my faith in you
In you
In you, in you
In you, in you
In you, you, you

For something ordinary
It's so extraordinary
I just, I put my faith in you
In you
In you, in you
In you, you, you

It flickers
It blisters
It glitters

In you, in you
In you, you, you
You are