Yuck

So last night I decided to drink.......not to get drunk.......to sleep........and 5 beers later I fell asleep and only woke up once......so I did sleep, but now I feel like death and being the idiot I am.....I have to work feeling like this......so I am sure that my already impatient attitude will be in full force tonight. Speaking of my impatience.......it is getting worse.......and WORSE. I have never been all that patient.....I am rather high strung for the most part.......going a thousand miles a minute.....so when it comes to waiting patiently for someone to get out what they need or walk across a room like a snail I am about ready to implode.....I really wish I did have more patience......but.......I just don’t. This is one of the many reasons I am getting out of the medical profession.........and going into the Business field........The Business world needs more high- strung-stressed out-insomnia -stricken-perfectionists......

Yes indeedy.

Moving on.......
I had a very strange conversation last night with Horsey.......trying to get across why I feel the way I do ....and do the things I do.......... I don’t think it went very well.......nope.
I really don’t think it did.....I woke up feeling like an ass......but that’s what I get for trying to make someone see what I am saying with a Sammy buzz on.........everything tends to get tweaked out and pushed completely out of perspective ....leaving one with a bad taste in their mouth..... which is not a result of the brews and fags......

Next agenda on the 'ol blog...well that would be.....


College


Oh that beautiful and glorious establishment of advanced education .oh how I love it so.....fuck me runnin........if it aint so........well......once again I am the queen of procrastination......I have to finish 7 assignments in Political Science by the 29th ......13 assignments in Biology.......create a website ........and lemme see.......take 3 finals.....

Fucking fabulous........

But!

It is doable as…..

I will have the house to meself tomorrow as Mr.C is heading up to Spokane to get his transplant testing done.......he will be poked and prodded and evaluated for 2 days......nothing to horrible, just a lot of interviews and such. I wish I could go with him.....but I just can’t take the time off from school..........dammit.

I hope he knows that I am always with him......regardless if it’s physical...I know it sounds corny but that’s just how I look at it....

I always will

Evil

I was visiting a buddies Blog today and it seems he has a rather evil Blog..........so me being me...... I decided to see how evil I rated

and well........

Here ya go.......




Tonight was an interesting night.......Worked with N2 and pretty much just chilled out.......Although I did find out that Israel......N2's BF's best friend thinks I am quote ..unquote........"hot"......and would like to take me out.......I was a bit flattered as he is extremely cute and sweet......I mean a really nice guy......but...I don't think so......I am not into getting involved with my friends friends if ya know what I mean.....Its a recipe for disaster on so many levels......and BEEN THERE DONE THAT!!!!......I have learned me lesson.........

Although, I am glad I have someone to flirt with and drive crazy......


I am such an evil bitch...

Damaged

This sums up my state of my mind.... and life as of late for that matter.........

QUEENSRYCHE

Damaged

Waiting for the feeling to subside,
Paranoid, I melt into myself.
They say I'm to reach inside and find
the broken part of my machinery.
Psychoanalyze the chapters
on the path to my darkest day.
Searching for the answers,
all I see is damage through the haze.
Picking up the pieces of my life
with no direction for re-assembly.
The one that lays beside me
is sharing scars of my broken yesterdays.
Will tomorrow find me hypnotized? Crying?
Mother Mary in control,
domineering stranglehold
sowing destructive seeds
for the scavengers to feed.
Driving the nail into my head,
memory flows like a river.
With the one that lays beside me
I'm healing scars from my childhood memories.
Tomorrow finally found me.
I'm hypnotized. I'm trying...
to understand the chapters
of the path from my darkest day.
Searching for the answers
but there's DAMAGE!

Will

My Buddie the The Cap'n sent me a nice version of a Living Will.......I thought it was o so appropriate ....as .......it is word for word what I myself, want in the event I succumb to a Terry S. situation.....


LIVING WILL

I, _________________________ (fill in the blank), being of sound mind
and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial
means.

Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of
peckerwood ethically challenged politicians who couldnt pass
ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it.

If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to sit up and ask for
a cold beer, it should be presumed that I wont ever get better. When
such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my spouse, children
and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call
it a day.
Under no circumstances shall the hypocritical members of the
Legislature (State or Federal) enact a special law to keep me on
life-support machinery. It is my wish that these boneheads mind their
own damn business, and pay attention instead to the health, education
and future of the millions of Americans who arent in a permanent
coma.

Under no circumstances shall any politicians butt into this case.
I don't care how many fundamentalist votes they're trying to scrounge
for their run for the presidency, it is my wish that they play
politics with someone elses life and leave me alone to die in peace.

I couldnt't care less if a hundred religious zealots send e-mails to
legislators in which they pretend to care about me. I don't know these
people, and I certainly haven't authorized them to preach and crusade
on my behalf.They should mind their own business, too.

If any of my family goes against my wishes and turns my case into a
political cause, I hereby promise to come back from the grave and make
his or her existence a living hell.

___________________________ Dated ______________________
Signature

__________________________________
Witness

__________________________________
Witness


In other news.....

My insomnia is back AGAIN!!! FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!

This my sleeping schedule for the past 2 nights.

Fall asleep @ 12:30AM
wake up @ 4AM

Watch TV and surf until 8AM.....Fall into a fitful sleep.
Wake up @ Noon....

so I am getting about 4 hours of sleep in 2 different cycles throughout the night......and I feel like a flippin zombie.....I am hoping this will run its course in the next few days as I need to be alert and aware for my finals coming up at the end of the month........

Me ribs are mucho better......I can actually do daily activities without limping and wincing...so I am happy in that aspect.....

I am right now trying to decide whether or not I want to vacuum or clean out the fridge......Either or.........Neither is something I am privy to doing on me day off.......but as all things in mlyfe.......it has to be done.......

such is life........

Personalities

Went to work last night...........well I wouldn’t call what I did last night working.......I pretty much just walked around and followed N2 all night while she did my work.......as I was in severe fucking pain..this is getting so old.....da pain is..........anyhoo........she didn’t seem to mind...she was all to happy to have me back as she now has someone to talk too........the only problem was she kept cracking me up as this grrl is LAUGHS.......the more I laugh the more pain I am in..it was a vicious night..........and it didn’t end after work........she offered to give me a ride home and I said sure as Mr. C needs to rest.....we head to her house as she needs a pack of cigs.........(my house is about 4 blocks away, but I guess she cant make it that far with out a hit of nic) so we sit down.....she offers me a beer.......calls her BF and proceeds to tell me we are going out.........OK...what the hell............although I am in pain ...holding my side and wincing......but… I am a trooper so I head out............we hit The Litter Box and in walks N2's BF Willard and his buddy Israel ..........conversation ensues..........all are having fun.....N2 is getting wasted.......I am casually sipping on my beer as I have eaten enough painkillers to kill a small cow and don’t feel the need to meet the ER Doc ........as I was saying ......... we are casually making small talk…..BUT Willard is getting on my nerves in a big way…..we all remember that little boy on the playground that teases and chases the girl cos he likes her so much? The one who says he doesn’t like her , but we all know he secretly is crazy about her? Well that’s what I felt like last night……..I am not saying Willard is crazy about me……….but he likes me……cos he wouldn’t let up with the snide remarks and sexual innuendos……….making remarks about everything from my sexuality to my looks to fucking everything……….well I kept up with him for a bit…….I am not a baby……I can give as good as I get………but after about 2 hours of this I am like…….”whoa here big fella………I am not into this lil game”….so say something to him about his age……….”what are you 26?” …”Ummmmm no”…….. he replies….”I’m 24”…. “Obviously”…I say………… he just gives me this look……..Israel gets exactly where I’m going with this………Willard replies about how old I am.……trying to get across I am TOO OLD....and I simply state that I am no longer accustomed to individuals who make it a habit of using insults as a platform for a conversation……… “Blank look from Willard”………seems he likes making N2’s GF’s cry or some such shit……….I then again reply “Are they that stupid?”……….this time Willard understood and apologized……and wouldn’t stop apologizing…….of course now I feel bad…as he is just a kid…..but I mean………I am not used to this and haven’t been in ages……….. The guys that usually talk to me are nothing but civil and nice…anyway…the night ended shortly after as N2 is extremely wasted and extremely pleased with how I handled her BF as she loses all her friend due to his demeanor and actions…we leave…. they drop me off…….and I go to bed……..

Just a big clash of the mature woman and the little boy…….trying to be a man..

Fun stuff

Speaking of fun stuff….I now get to return to work………Mamma B is working with me tonight…..she offered to take my load……….I feel a bit better today…….but I am sure that will change after I arrive at the ‘ol J.

Strange

Ok so life is an odd thing now isn't it? I mean really........Seems my joboal hasn't accepted the fact that I no longer wish to work there......I am on the damn schedule today.......So me.....Being me.....Will go in.........What the hell? I called last night for shits and giggles to see if I was on today's schedule and it seems I am......I didn't even show up on Monday(Although I don't really think I was supposed to).......Called in Tuesday....and figured that would be enough.Guess not. I am not a quitter....Never have been......I usually just get to a stage to where I don't give a fuck and slack and wait to be told.. "Hey.....We don't need you anymore.....So you may go"...Which is for me .... AOK.....but seems they don't want to let me go..or rather maybe they want me to come in so they can tell me face to face Buh Bye! That is going to piss me off.....as to me its a waste of my time to go into a place and be told I am no longer an employee.........When they can do it over the phone or just take me off of the schedule....so we shall see.......

Moving on......

Mr.C has appointments next week with the kidney transplant coordinators.......to get all his testing up to date......and get moved up on the list.......which is really good......cos he is pretty much down to the end of the wire with where he can have anymore fistuals put in........so after we get all his testing up to date.......he will then receive his beeper and then its the "Hurry up and wait" game.......always fun...

I best get showered and try and get rid of this coffee buzz I have accumulated this AM......I am all jittery and jumpy.....Hate it......Feel like a nervous wreck......but that's what happens when you wake up at 7AM....Bright eyed and bushy tailed......Drink JAVA......and twiddle your thumbs.......
plus take care of your finacial aide BS for next the school next year.....

Update
The ribs are better today.....still paining me some......but not so much I cant move without wincing.....I still cant sneeze or laugh.......that still makes me uncomfy.....but other than that I feel I may live.........


I just might.......

Sidenote
Spell check on the Blogger here sucks ass!!!!

In a big way!

so Blogger Gods I suggest you get on that........

ASAP

Loss

So I (of course) have not written about the loss of the Pope nor Terry S. I guess I feel that the 24/7 coverage is enuff and reading another Blog about those certain events is not necessary. So instead of writing about what I know everyone knows I will instead write about what I feel.........

Terry- She deserved to die with more dignity than having her photo splashed about the world....Did anyone stop to consider if she would have wanted her photo in every magazine, Newspaper, and TV show? I think not............The debate about whether or not she should have been allowed to stay connected to the feeding tube is of course a delicate matter. I however, am against such said measures after a certain amount of time. Perhaps it has to do with watching my late mother suffer with MS for 11 yrs........and the current situation with my brother.......my thoughts are if one is injured......and has a chance at returning to a normal life...........meaning a life with substance, where one can enjoy their families and lives....I am all for it.....as at a certain point the need for such interventions will no longer be necessary....Its for the individuals who will never be the same....Who are in constant need of care.........cannot survive without 24/7 assistance that I begin to have issue.

...I am in awe of how far medical science has come, what we can accomplish with regards to illness and treatments......Transplants.......Medications.....Etc...I am very thankful for medical science as without it my brother would not be here today........the issue I have with medical intervention is this.........if one has an episode or an accident......like the one Terry S. had........a stroke I made a mistake here.....she actually had a heart attack due to being Bulimic which thus resulted in her being brain damaged due to having NO oxygen for over 10 minutes....this is when ethics and morals come into play. The knowledge the Doctors had when they first examined her ...that...she was brain damaged to such an extent that she would never be the same..........that she could never live without constant medical attention.......at that moment.....right then and there...... is when one needs to ask.......Was she supposed to of died? Who are we to keep her alive when she is not capable of any coherent thought, and never will be? Who are we to truly know what she would have wanted? When do we stop playing God?

I believe that a law should be put into effect for every citizen with regards to having a living will......It should be a requirement just like having a license or an ID..........everyone should be able to put in writing what they want done in the event something catastrophic happens........this will alleviate any and all court proceedings........and stop draggin out an individuals life for a decade or more.........

Pope-I am not catholic. Although I should be. My family is catholic. German Catholics.......very strict Catholics........my mother told my brother and I to make our own choice..........as she wasn't given the option............I still haven't been baptized...........but I believe in God.......

I believe the Pope lived a very long and fulfilling life.....gave his life to his church and his religion, not to mention God. Pay tribute to Pope John Paul II ...... remember his accomplishments..... Let him rest in piece. Choose a successor........

One who will fulfill the needs of the Church and the people.

Ribs

I just now returned from my ER venture.......seems my ribs aren’t broken.....I have pulled the cartilage in me ribs...this is what me DR told me....."Direct blows to the ribs may bruise or break the ribs or injure to the rib cartilage. The ribs may tear away from the cartilage that attaches them to the breastbone. This tearing away from the cartilage is called a costochondral separation".
So that is what I am suffering from costochondral separation....this here defines exactly what I have been fearing the past 3 days "The initial chest pain may subside, but over the next few hours or days pain increases with movement, interfering with sleep and activity and becoming severe with coughing or deep inspiration. The patient is often worried about having a broken rib, and may have a sensation of bony crepitus or abnormal rib movement".
The fearing of having a broken or fractured Rib was really my main concern as this can cause severe damage to my organs..e.g puncturing a lung ....or some other necessary organ..............

So needless to say I will heal in about 3 weeks........Doc told me to try and breathe deeply as I am now prone to catching pneumonia.......seems I am breathing more shallow now without knowing it and so I have to remember to breathe DEEP.........yea sure...........that shit hurts doc!!!.........

I bet you are all wondering how this lil ingery here happened to me.... right?

Well..........I was having a nice time with me buds in Portland.........and Binks........my best guy buddy gave me a really big hug.......a bear hug............and he seems to forget how strong he is.. He’s like 6'4 and 230 lbs.......and he seems to 4get how fragile I am........I mean I may act all tuff.........but I am still a grrl..........tall.....thin.......and fragile........well he comes up behind me and picks me up.......and SQUEEZES.....like a Boa Constrictor.........I remember yelling at him to let me go........he did...............and I felt a lil dizzy but OK.......it wasn’t until I woke up @ 2AM that I felt the initial pain..........OUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!........I managed to get through the day......with the help of Mr. Advil and YagerMyster ....was a slow painful day but I took it slow....and the next day I flew home......I had a few "emergency" pills to get me through the flight and the 2 hour drive home......it was the minute I got home and relaxed that the pain really hit........Mr. C gave me one of his vicodin.........and I was OK............yesterday was sheer hell..........so today I just couldn’t bear it any more............no insurance or not.....I went in..........I think the worrying was the worst part.......not knowing what was wrong......and the fact I cant move without wanting to cwy..........So I will live..........

Moving on............I will now try and give a better description of me trip to Portland. All was going well.....I seen everyone...........we all met and had a good time..............Patti Anne, Clogs, Binks,Suzilla and even Lori dropped in 4 a sec.........we ventured back to Zilla'z house to finish off the night...........was the next day that it turned to shit........I woke up in excruciating pain....and Clogs and Zilla were feeling no pain and ready to start the day off with breaky......so we went and had breaky........I couldn’t eat...or sit......or breathe......here I am trying to be fun......as they haven’t seen me in ages......and I can barely force a smile.........well I asked if we could leave and we did.......Zilla wanted to mow her lawn and so I decided to leave for a bit......thought maybe a drive would make me feel better........plus her House is FREEZING......so I leave.....and I take my things and put them in me car as I never leave my belongings anywhere.......past experiences have learned me well..........anyway I leave and say I will return........I drive for a bit........half looking for a hotel as I wasn’t up to sleeping in the freezing house in a cold bed (with other lovely attributes)......anyway..........about this time Binks calls me and asks me where I was......I tell him....he shows up.......we are sitting laughing and chatting when my cell rings......is Zilla............I ignore as I am not in the mood to deal with her at the said moment...........about 40 minutes later I call my voicemail ........she is going on about how I must have decided to leave b4 my weekend was over.......and then she begins to accuse me of STEALING from her........her bracelet or some such shit.......at first I think she is talking about the bracelet she had given me but noooooo.......tis the one her BF gave her........
OK so I call her.........we exchange words...........and that was that........in less time than it takes to flush the toilet she had thrown away are entire friendship...............accusing me of stealing from her.....which just blows my mind as I lived with her for a year........took care of her house, truck, everything..........I knew where all her stuff was.......I had access to everything..........if I was going to steal from her I would have done it when I moved.....not when I return for a visit..........wait.......I wouldn’t in a million years steal from her or any of my friends........
I cannot fathom how she could even begin to think about accusing me........so to sum it up..........I am no longer friends with her.........or Clogs as her behavior was basically... "OH Well" she wasn’t exactly in corner......... "Not my problem......" I believe that was what she said......seems her only problem is the affair she is having with the married man she is working with right now.......but that’s a diff story.........although I did tell her she was stupid......how she can sleep at night is beyond me........perhaps that’s why she wasn’t exactly rooting for me.......I don’t know.......

Binks summed it up best "What did u expect? Its Zilla!".....Well I expected to NOT be accused of stealing......I expected to not have Clogs back her up.....I expected to be treated with a little respect..........that’s all.............I did nothing wrong.......was on my best behavior....hell I was actually rather sedate.........as I was more concerned with my brother .......regardless...........I will not be returning.......and I will not be talking to Zilla nor clogs again.........in this lifetime...........seems such a waste..........it really does..........life is too short....I guess they don’t see it.......I do..........I always have.

Again........moving on........

This is turning out to be a really long Post .........but oh well.........I am now going to try and eat...........and clean up a bit.......if I can......hurts to move........Mr. C and I are quite a pair.......he's hobbling around after his surgery..................I’m hobbling around.........We be the Hobblers....

Ok then.........

I best try and get soemthing consrtuctive done....

Home

I am back, with a cracked rib.
I am going to the DR tom. to get a script....I am in so much pain its unreal.
Binks!!!


The trip was.....not so good....was good 2 c Patti Anne and Binks....even Clogs......but suzilla can fall off of a cliff........

I'm done

o
I quit my Job 2 day as well....cannot work with a cracked rib......and the J will not believe me.......Pissed off over Mr. C as it is........so fuck em! Right where they eat.....more time to focus on school and PS ...........(Shocker knows what this means)...................................

So .........I am in no shape to write now......the only way I am managing is thanx 2 Mr.C's surgery pills................so I will end this ..........just know I am happy 2 B home.........happy I know who MY REAL FRIENDS ARE and happy to have MR.C and Domino in the same house....


I have to lie down and die!!

THANK YOU BINKS!!!


CockKnocker!!!

Leaving

I am all set to leave.

• I have made all the necessary calls.
• Finished the assignment due this week.
• Made arrangements for Domino (Mr.C's Kitty).
• Packed....entirely too much as usual
• Transferred necessary funds

I think that is about all......I woke up at 7AM.......to get everything arranged as I am not sure when I will be returning..............so the day started something like this.......did the assignment.....made calls to Mr.C's People..and locked myself out of the house.......ahhh yea....after I had checked to make sure I had bolted and locked all the windows.........uh huh.........I was heading nxt door to speak with Kuntjoy.......and 4got I had the door locked behind me.....SLAM!...OH SHIT!!!! I cry..........needless to say after a bit of twisting and squirming I got my skinny butt in my window after Kuntjoy flicked the stick out of the window.......in the process I pulled something in my leg.....OUCH!!......I have since walked it off.......but it hurt like the dickens......did I just say dickens? Christ. anyway......I need 2 B sure to put a longer stick in the window as that is a nice way for me neighbors to take us 4 whatever it is they would want......Whatever that may be......

Mr.C just rang me....seems they put a hickman catheter in his chest......and he is in serious pain......fuckers......Y cant they leave him alone? Y !!!!!!!!!!

There are a lot of Y's going through my head as of late ......... at the moment I have no time to elaborate.......nor do I think I really want too........not today

maybe later.

when I get back.........

stress

I woke up this AM......went to make the coffee......make the call.....you know 2 C how my brother was doing when in walks Kuntjoy........apparently Miss James had called him saying that my brother called her stating that the surgery had been cancelled and he wanted her to come up there.........

Ok........I am abit upset about this bit of info.....and apparently it is true as the hospital cannot find any record of him.....as while Kuntjoy is explaining this to me......I am on the phone with about 4 individuals at SH.....so I am a bit worried now as yesterday Mr.C was doing his " I cannot live like this anymore and I wont let them put another graft in me ....and " Well you et the picture. I then tell Kuntjoy that this is why I don’t want this grrl around him as now I don’t know what to believe.....if he is freaking out cos he couldn’t have the procedure done or if she has misconstrued the info......and so on......I am also kicking myself as I now remember why I always go with him as when this happens I am there and deal with the situation without him running off ........

So I leave a message for Mr. C to call me NOW.....or I am coming up there......

So I wait and wait.......

ring ring
Its him......Just GOT out of surgery......seems like I said......Miss James had it all messed up.....BUT.......Mr. C said the surgery might have been a bust ....they were going to try and dialyze him.......and if it didn’t work they would have to do the other surgery....I then say I am coming up there.....He absolutely doesn’t want me there..which is ......well BS! I mean this really hurts me.....he is adamant about it as well.....so here I sit......worried.....not knowing.......great fun.....
Kuntjoy told me to take the Jimmy if I wanted......I told him I would wait and see what happens with the big D.......if he can be run....then I will wait until tom. if not.....I am heading up.....

tuff tities Mr.C

Thats what big sisters do....... love you even when you dont want 2 be loved......

other than that........I am just trying to keep busy...fixed the vacuum....."the bran new Hoover mind you"....read a few blogs......checked on my assignments.......and basically talked and shouted to myself all day........

fun.
I find myself missing someone though.......allot.......times like this is when you wonder if you didn’t make a mistake......having someone love you is not always great, but then again love is not always sunny beautiful days......
Ok I am off to tan.......try and get out of here 4 a sec...........

The CELLY is practically a part of my anatomy 2day......I cant miss a call.......

I am worried sick....

Gone

Mr.C has made it up to Spookaloo......his surgery is in the AM.....he absolutely refused to let me go with him..........so I will be there Wed......he likes to handle things on his own......and this time I let him......Usually I tell him I am going with him whether he likes it or not.....but this time I let him have his way..perhaps another reason might be that I really wasn't up to the drive and watching him get poked and prodded again.........nope.......cant say that I am up 4 that.......but......if he needs me I will be up there in a NY minute........no doubt.

Moving on........
I am so tried you have no idea.........Exhausted.......and all I wanna do is eat ice cream and watch the tube.......which I think I will do........

I found out something today........I was somewhat disappointed, but I am grateful I found out......put things back into perspective for me.......no more 'wondering'.....no more......thankfully..cos lemme tell you not knowing something sometimes takes up to much damn energy............

I am off........

Heartbeat

Yesterday ALL DAY....my heart was acting like it was on a flippin rollercoaster all damn day......... arrhythmia ...yes that is what I am suffering from.....2day it isn't as pronounced, but it was enuff to scare the shit out of me.........I did some research and am glad to say that my heart wasn't beating 2 fast ...........Tachycardia.......or 2 slow.....Bradycardia......it continued its 80bpm....but man.......I have suffered from the irregular heartbeat in the past......due to taking to many 'ludes'......but this wasn't the case......maybe the alcohol consumption from the night b4.......but I really don't think I drank all that much to tell u true........
oh well.......I hope me ticker keeps a tick'n 2day without the hiccups..

Moving on.....

I must call Mr.C's Dr's 2 day........and make arrangements 4 him 2 have his surgery.....he will most likely be admitted tonight and have a temp. catheter put into his chest so he can dyalize.......(and here I am complaining about my heart)...and the surgery the following day.....

Poor guy........I could devote an entire Blog to him and his life ......with regards to what he has gone through and I still don't think I could make a dent into what his suffering...........

Ok .....I cant rally discuss my brother....makes me sad.......

I must b off .......need some coffee.....hope it doesnt freak my heart out.......


I am to young for this.......Don't you think?

Aren't we all?

Intrigued

Well I finished my assignment in English 355..only 1.5 weeks late......and I also finished watching Clerks and Bridget Jones, Edge of Reason....both were OK.....although I enjoyed the 1st BJ flick better......and better yet....I enjoyed the books way more........I actually laughed out loud while reading those particular books.............thinking about reading makes me miss Barnes&Noble quite a bit.....I used 2 spend quite a bit of time in that shop....drinking mass amounts of that legal narcotic known as caffeine while reading books 4free........twas a good time......

Well I finally got to speak to NB.....and I must say it was a good chat.......I found myself smiling quite a bit........which I haven't done in some time......so yes.....I am glad I finally made contact with my fave Blogger........

I am off to bed now......I have 2 B up early in the AM in order 2 make a few calls regarding my brothers surgery........

ciao

Sluggish

Went out last night with N2 in order to celebrate her friends 21st B-day.......and in the process met a few new friends and re-discovered how much I dislike hangovers. We hit about 3 bars and had a good time.........we even had a designated driver.....can you believe that nonsense? I must be getting more and more responsible as my days continue.....

Mr.C is still unhappy.....and I cant blame him....the worst part about this is his DR wont prescribe him any painkillers..for some damn reason...luckily I had a few and gave him a few.....his arm is really sore.........

I am now in the process of watching Clerks .........and so far this is pretty cool.........

I am also reading a new Blog.........which I am not at liberty to share........but I am actually becoming a bit interested in this individual.......not romantically.......but in a way to where I would like 2 know more about them.........We have exchanged a few messages and so forth......so hopefully I will make a new Blog Buddie........


Well I am goin 2 finish this flick.........rather fitting flick for EASTER.....

I will return........

Sad Man

Things have a way of going from bad to worse sometimes.......

My brother suffers from renal failure and must dialysis 3x weekly ...... This is accomplished by, having large volume of blood being removed from the body, then run through the dialysis machine, and returned to the body.This is best accomplished by using a surgically created fistula or shunt between the arteries and veins, which results in a high rate of flow through the shunt, as is needed for dialysis. While these shunts are vital for successful dialysis, they are often difficult to keep open and this leads me to the problem at hand. He must go up to Spokane in order to have the Surgery that will be needed to successfully remove the clot from the graft.......

He has had to do this several times in the past......and it is a painful and strenuous procedure as they must keep him in the hospital to test the graft by dialyzing him to make sure the surgery was successful.........and this is......... for Mr. C...... the worst part of the whole ordeal.......the hospitalization......He has been in and out of hospitals his entire life......so spending even one day in the hospital....for him......is utter hell.........

The biggest problem this has brought forward is the fact that his Concert is this coming Wednesday.........Motley Crue........his all-time fave band......and from the looks of things he will miss it.......as will I........... as I wont go without him........... I wouldnt even consider it.

Another problem this is presenting is my trip to Portland may have to be postponed........but we shall see.......as I wont leave him in the hospital and my Aunt is leaving for Alaska today.......so there wont be any family here if something does go wrong........

So in a nutshell........

Mr.C is extremely depressed ......Hospitalization and missing his band.......makes for a sad day......and a very sad ....sad man.

Cant talk

So I am minding my own bizz 2day and I get accused of commenting something on someone's Blog.....Something I would never say.....About a song that I have been listening to forever......b4 this individual was in diapers......and I end up being the bitch....(of course) also I was told that my friend was responsible for the comment......Ok......that of course is not true either.....I spoke with the friend 2day.........which actually was nice as I hadn't spoken with her in awhile.... That's neither here nor there......back to the bitch bloggin .......seems her ( My friends)ISP connection is no longer.......she is offline so 2 speak......rendering her commenting capabilities at a standstill......so there you go.......

Then it occurs 2 me that perhaps this anonymous commenter.....could be..well ........ANYONE!!!


I then began to wonder why I am letting this petty BS get 2 me..........and Jen (me friend) asked me the same thing......as it is petty..........she then mentioned 2 me......that if I wanted 2 say anything I would have done so.....and left my sig.......as I have nothing to hide........

Which is veddy true..........

So in the end....I wound up getting wound up over nothing.......about a Blog I really only read maybe twice a week......

Beats an otherwise dull day I spose.........


regardless........I am glad its over........I will no longer be taking part in anymore squabbling or finger pointing ....or allwoing myself to get upset over something so trivial and unimportant......


I do hope she resolves her issue...... with regards to the mysterious Blog Bashing commentator.......... wouldnt want her 2 lose any sleep....
















Moving on.......

I am watchin the Bourne Supremacy......and I must say its not to shabby..........I liked the 1st mucho better........but tis not to bad........

I went out last night with Mr. C ....he needed my ear......we had a good chat......and a good time........

always nice..........


ok then,

I must end this lil bitch Blog and finish the movie......

Oh and thank you Jen....for your ear and for everything else........

appreciate it..........

cheers

How could I 4get?

Every day I sit here and think to myself......"I need 2 write something FUNNY and AMUSING and something political or motivational or.....or...or...and and??????????

Well.......seems I have 4gotton Y I started this damn Blog to begin with....and I have Mr. Dakota to thank for reminding me of y I started this Blog.......

http://johnnydakota.blogspot.com/

I started this for Me...Myself...and I....as a way to pass the time I am spending in this sleepy tired 'ol town.....and like in me first Post I mused that.... in the process.........perhaps I may amuse myself and....maybe....... a few others along the way.......


Now a Blog for the most part is just a personal journal.......and us Bloggers who do use this tool to vent our lives into.....well....we are comfy in the fact that others will read it.......the reader might be a lone reader or sometimes there may be several .......and maybe.....just maybe....you sometimes get a few readers who come back again and again..which is alwayz nice....but......I think that's what I found to be...for me....BlogPressure........as I am always trying or I was trying to make sure what I wrote wasn't to personal or to boring ......well ......I now no longer feel the need to think this way as I am going back to my initial thought process.......

I will write exactly what I want .....about whatever I want.......whenever I want.....and without sounding like an ass.......I will do this........to entertain ME!

;)

So for a certain individual who has been lurking about......you know who u r........u were the main reason I was hindering my posts.......well no more.........if you don't like it........Don't read it........I would really rather u didn't......

ok then....

Thanx again Jonny.......I truly love your Blog.... I am an avid fan.......once I figure out how to add my fave links on here......you will be #1...

I am off ......I just ate a whole can of sghetti o's with meatballs........and am FULL UP......

:((((

blahhh...

I shall return.....

ciao 4 now...

Just a Post..

Here I am again ...sitting at my PC.....trying to think up something amusing to write about..... something entertaining or objective or informative.....and well I have ....NOTHING....

typical.


I am at the moment in the process of cleaning out my closets.....putting the winter wardrobe in the back...bringing out the summer/Spring wardrobe.......so much fun.....I jut had to share it with the blogger world.......


I also need to finish up the goddamn assignment for my 355 class......I received a not so nice email from my instructor asking me where the hell last weeks assignment was....and well.....I don't have the balls to tell her I haven't had the ambition nor the slightest interest in writing about more multi media BS.............but I best get me ass in gear if I am to pass the class......

Moving on.......

I talked with Patti Anne for quite awhile last night.....seems her son has gotten himself into a pretty big spot.......she needed an ear.....which I was very happy to give her.......That's what friends are for......anywayz.....I told her that the situation would work itself out as most things do.......so she shouldn't fret none.......she agreed ......

I finally found the applicator for my nicotrol dealy....so I am sucking on it now....trying to kick the 'habit'....the only problem is I don't know if I will ......in all honesty....... B able 2 use this thingy in public....as it looks like a tiny tampon and I really don't want to have people giving me the double take......"did you see that girl........she is suckin on tampon.....EWWWWWWWWWW!!''

no I would rather like to avoid that ..... if at all possible.....

Well then.....I best check out and get this flippin assignment done b4 9PM.....

lata'

Love the Queen

My brother bought a few new DVD's the other day........he only buys music DVD's ......but dammit man he has good taste........he bought Led Zepplin and Queensryche . Now I have been a fan of both sonce b4 I was able to appreciate music and genuine talent......anyone who loves rock-n-roll admires the Zep.....but when it comes to the Ryche.......well I feel that they are way underrated ...which is unfortunate as they are extremely talented (ecspecially Geoff Tate...ooooooolala ;) and are brilliant song writers......just listen to operation mindcrime and you will see what I mean.......well anyhoo.....I have been watching these DVD's........ and that of course......... sparked me interest about what the Q guys are up to as of late.......and I about fell over when I read on their website that they are..... in fact.... going to release Operation Mindcrime 2 this Fall.........HELL YEA!....now a lot of folks out there are saying you cannot top the first one or that they are only doing this as they have sold out or some other BS..........but as for me ......I cant wait.......as I am dyin 2 know who killed Sister Mary ....

Other than that I really haven't been up to much.........I do however have an update on the Kuntjoy drama........seems he felt so bad about his outburst and insane behavior he had to leave, but not b4 he called me and came over beggin me for my forgiveness........and what was I supposed 2 do but give it? When a grown man cries.......I crumble like a school grrl.........and cave........so I do hope he is OK wherever he is.......and gets better........

Family........

cant kill 'em and ya cant take 'em.......anyplace

Well I am leaving in about 12 days and I am happy....as I really need a holiday........

Oh and I wanted to say HELLO 2 Fairy Grrl......she called me from the Big Apple last night and it seems she is doing very well and has already made some friends .....so good 4 you babe!! Miss YA!!!

I just changed the Font......I like this much better.....

Anyhoo.......my brother is running around here in his typical shitass mood.......maybe its his time of the month...I swear he is more moody than a woman........its horrible.......

Moving on.......


I am having a situation with the Shockeroo......seems I am an object of obsession....which I mean is always nice.....and flattering.....but I cannot seem to get it across to Shocker that I am not willing nor able to make a commitment at this stage of me life.......but it just doesn't seem to sink in.......I want to be friends.....and well.......and just go from there........

So......there you go......


I must get off of here.......I have to return a few calls and write a few emails and do some work in English.......


I shall return......

same batchannel,same battime.....

Tootles

Unbelievable

Today was a rather uneventful day to say the least........

I did laundry, vacuumed, dishes, shopped......

The usual....

I was enjoying my day to be truthful.......Just chillin..........no real too doo....

so...
I was watching A Knights Tale..... and folding me laundry......

When....
In BURSTS Marcus Kuntjoy......(Kunt 4 short).......he is my cousin who lives next door......he slams open my door and walks in YELLING and BITCHING about how I never answer my phone and that he has been BANGING on the walls trying 2 get my attention..(??) OKKKK anywayyy....so I stand up and go "what the fuck is you problem?!"....he responds "My Mother is running a temp and needs a fucking advil!"...ok .......So .........I say "well what the fuck.....? I take it you HAD to get out of your bed and walk the 30 feet over here to get one?! ....at 8:30 in the evening after your looooong and stressful day!"....he then goes on and on about how I never answer my phone and bla bla bla......I then retort by saying "its my flippin phone and if I don't want to answer...... I wont! ....Furthermore for his info it is on vibrate," ...........
I then stop myself in mid sentence as I stop and think to myself..."Y am I explaining myself 2 this Asshole?"

I then explain to him....I have no idea of knowing whats going on next door.....and etc......which just pisses him off more as the phone thingy gets brought up again!

Enter Mr.C ....who now comes out about this time and tells him(Kuntjoy) to stop being a dick and go home......I give him the advil and he slams out the door......but not b4 I told him he was a fucking asshole.......so of course now( or I was) furious as I did nothing wrong here... which ..Regardless....I am still the badguy or grrl and I am sick of being the bad guy for not doing anything..but minding my own business in my own home.........

Well.....
I then check my phone 2 see when he did call ...and wouldn't you know it?.......there wasn't 1 missed call!....the fucker didn't even CALL ME! So ......in all actuality it was my brothers phone he was calling......and Mr. C never does answer his phone.......so this was all about Mr. C.........no scratch that......it wasn't about either one of us......It was about Kunjoy.....and the fact that he is so full of himself and cant be bothered to walk across the lawn to get his 67 yr old mother a fliipin advil (even when she is sick mind you).....and becos he had to actually do something he got pissed off........poor poor Kuntjoy..........

Well.......as it sits...he is no longer allowed in my home....... Mr. C concurred......I am not dealing with his drama anymore........as....well.....I don't HAVE 2!!

I mean really.........all he does is SIT....and that's all folks!

Kuntjoy is a..........

48 yr old mammas boy......no job.....no $.....pill junkie ....loser.....mooching....backstabbing.....asshole........and lets see..this has been going on now 4..... about............ 3 YEARS!!!!

Unfuckingbelievable!

As far as I am concerned he can stay on his side of the fence........ as I am done listening to him on a weekly basis go on and on about his poor miserable life and how he cant get a break and he cant stop taking pills and ....well u get the picture.........he is family.....but after tonight's little episode......I think I am at my wits end........and the best part about this whole mess is how he will weave this into being my fault somehow..........and people will buy it!!

Well........goody.........



I'm DONE!

sigh'

I feel much better now

Thank God for me lil bloggy

nice place 2 vent

very nice.

ok....

now that I am glad I vented......I am now going to lie down and get some shut eye.......I have 2 work tomorrow and finish up my web page for English 355......

g'nite

sweat

I am working out like a fool and sweating even worse.....but for me that's the best part of working out.....the sweating.......LOVE IT!!!

i know

sick.

o well.......

I am heading offf 2 work now.......I am off @ 8pm and then I think....I think....I am going to see a flick tonight.....not to sure yet...........sick of coming home .....so boring here........

alrighty then........well I best scat like a cat

i know

dork.

o well......

I'm outy


lata'

2 much....2 little.....means......nothing

This weekend was well.....in a word...INSANE...but in a good way........Antoniose spent the weekend here......which was nice and cool........pretty much watched flicks and laughed a lot......Sat. night we all went out.....meaning me, Stacey Mechelle, Jeffery , Mr. C and the rest of the crew.....fun was had by all.......but seeing how I was with me friends all weekend I really didn't get much accomplished. I did get the house cleaned and updated the auto insurance, but other than that nadda........which is unfortunate as I need to get my 2nd psychology exam taken and finish up my English 355 project........so I will be playing catch up all this week.......

fun.

lets see ...other than that........well............I am at a loss......I really have nothing more to contribute to the 'ol Blog........

It seems sometimes I have too much material and then at other times I have none......I really need to get caught up in the local news and so forth.....although I have been watching the Jacko trial updates.......ummmmm...........He's a bit out there..........wait a minute......a bit? I would have to say he IS ALL THE way out there.......not even in the flippin ball park anymore............

Lets hope they get him convicted and put him somewhere where he cant hurt anymore children again.............

ok

I am off to do the work thing...........

ciao

Trips,tips,and ?

I am now completely and utterly ready for me trip......Plane has been reserved, car, and all that's left is packing......and ummmmm.....this time I am going to try not to overpack........which will be a small miracle if I can.........not overpack that is ..... cos....... I always feel I need to bring my entire wardrobe.....but......now that I think of it.....with my wardrobe growing like it is.........that might be a possibility I needn't worry about.......Ok

Moving on.........

I found a great place to buy my perfumes.....perfumebay.com....love it! I just re-stocked up on me Burberry and Lanvin.......and also Chanel Chance...I haven't bought this one yet.....but its on the list.......yup.......going to add it to me lil smellnice family......

I am finding all kinds of nifty sites to buy stuff from lately..........and so far "fingers crossed" I haven't been ripped off or had my identity stolen.......so "knock on wood"....I wont have to go through an experience such as that.......anytime soon...of ever for that matter....

Nothing really new other than that.......I am doin me homework today and possibly going out tonight with some friends.......other than that I got nothin baby.......the well is dry......

Oh I did watch the Manchurian Candidate last night..

LAME.

bypass this flick if you see it.........

ok folks......

Have a great weekend.....

ciao

El Coley's trip

So I finally committed to a date and time to go 2 Portland.....and I cant wait..... ( I decided to just forget about the drama factor.....Drama is like a badhair day.....its inevitable and we all have our fair share....)
I am leaving on the 31st the DAY AFTER the concert my brother and I are going to in Spokaloo......I figured since I was there I might I as well fly out instead of having to come all the way back home to just turn around and go back.....yadda yadda......so anyways......I shall be flying outa here in about 2.5 weeks......I am looking forward to it.....I need a holiday.......from mlyfe........sooooooo other than that I really have nothing more to report......I am in the midst of my 3 day weekend.....and I had planned on getting out of here for a few , but I haven't managed 2 do much yet 2day.......Although after I finish this here short story......I will jump in the car and do my errands and enjoy what's left of this beautiful day....as lemme tell you folks....here in the Pacific Northwest......the weather is breathtaking.......70ish and gorgeous......


Tends 2 make people put on one of these......


:)



Moving on...

I spoke with a friend last night.....and I got the feeling that I perhaps divulged 2 much.......so I will have 2 in the future try and refrain from talking about certain details in mlyfe......I am finding that I am having 2 do this a lot......as certain individuals are lurking about in mlyfe as of late and to be honest its really BUG!......but what can ya do?

nadda.


I am listening to this song by Charlie Robinson................El Cerrito Place
I like this 'ol cuntry tune very much....Its sad but nice.......I can relate......been there several times.......

Speaking of El Emexico.........I am going to Mehico in October.......my friend Suzilla has 2 time shares......1 on the beach and 1 by a golf course......so we are gonna spend our time in between the 2 places.....both places are 5 star quality as well.......so yea.....I am looking forward to that as well...........all I have to pay is me airfare and its BUH BYE!!!!.......

fun.


ok well I have nothing else

I'm spent.

I shall return..........

stay tuned...

tootles...

Currently in the life of.....

So I haven't been keepin my the 'ol blog as updated as I would like too......but I guess the reason is …. I have nothing all that exciting to report as of late....

But I am going to give it a try today……so here we go…

lets see.......
Work- Well its been ok...for the most part…cept’...my boss yesterday tried to go off on me....and when I say tried that's exactly what I mean....she trots on up to me and starts bitching about the shift prior to mine and that I need to bla bla bla......so I say ''WhoA there Nelly!........I am not responsible for that shift and I just walked in the door not 15 minutes ago so why don’t you go vent your action elsewhere?" She looked @ me.......smiled......and went "I guess I am being a bit pissy huh?" I say "Ummmmm....yea you kinna are".......she laughed and went to bitch at someone else........which was AOK with me.so other than that…. work is well…..work........same 'ol same 'ol

School- Well that is going exceptionally well...........as noted in previous posts.

Friends- All good........well except for one......but she will be OK soon I hope.....she had an unfortunate happening with her pregnancy.......so I hope she will be OK... :(
Other than that all me friends are good........

Family- Mr. C has finally stopped acting like an ass.........which is always good........lets see......I did 4get my Aunts B-day........I thought it was the 12th......was the 7th.....so today I am going out and buying "Make-up" B-day gifts and cake..........as I feel like a piece of used toilet paper.

Lemme see.......All other aspects of my life are going OK........I dont know how many other aspects there are with regards to mlyfe......but whatever they are.......its all gravy.


I am single again.......which is OK.....I am not good with relationships and maybe I never will be. I love it when I explain this to people and I always get the "Well aren’t you worried that you will end up all alone?" Ummmmmmm...no I am not.......never have been......and as far as I have seen.......we all end up alone in the end anyway......its who you share your life with that matters......and for me….. my family and friends and the occasional fling have always been enough......I am not ruling out the possibility of the "ONE"...but as of right now.....with school.....Mr.C.....work.....and all of it.......I just don’t have the energy.........so there you go..........


Sometimes though…… I do get pissed when I get cornered about the “your still single and no kids!.. OH MY GOD! ”rhetoric...….well……its not the end of the world…..perhaps your world is coming to an end as my life seems to be of utmost importance to you…..but for me……its okey dokey….
My family has learned to stop hounding me about being single…….. as every time I start getting the business......I just ask the person who is giving me the businesses at the said moment how the 3 marriages they were in worked out? Seems to always get my point across right quick..


Lets see.....



The Portland trip is on/off again........its not the $ factor.......its the drama factor........I miss my buddies, but I don’t miss the drama.......I have my plate full of it here.........over full.........but.........I am hoping maybe the end of the month I will scoot on over for a weekend.......and then make plans for my VIVA LAS VEGAS!!!.....



ok.....


well........ I have not been reading the news.....oh wait........I did see something yesterday..... MT. ST. Helens blew her stack yesterday......I did see that......now that I remember that……( Such a small occurrence don’t you know…almost a daily dealy).. I need to call me buds in Portland and see what’s what......other than that… I am clueless about the happenings in the world.....and that's pretty sad as I started this 'ol blog to talk about politics and such and the last few moths have been anything but political spew....


Oh Well...........


Well tis time for me to work out........been slacking there as well.......but its all good.. Then I am off to buy a surround sound for my room....a new one........and buy Aunt Glo her (belated I am so sorry B-Day) gifts....


I shall return...

Till then

Keep it on ice...


lata'

YES!!

Ok folks.......Time for me to brag......

I just received my grade back for my biology Mid-term......I received 85%.....so a B+
For my essays I received 100%.....so an A+

YES!!!!

I am so psyched.....as that is by far my hardest class.....

I received 94%.....so an A on my psychology exam....saweet!

This Wednesday my brother and I both are going to the library so I can do all of my Political Science stuff........I cant believe he wants to go with me.....but when I do well in school he gets all excited and happy........Its funny actually.....as my brother could care less about academics, but when it comes to me he really does.....pretty proud of me ....yes he is...


Yesterday was a good day as well...I spent the day with Antoniose......my best friend......we literally grew up together.....and I haven't spent any time with him since I came back here....so it was good to hang out with him and his brother for the day....... fun was had by all......especially when we were all trotting down memory lane.....o boy.....did we ever have fun re-visiting the past......I would have 2 say say that we were all a bit crazy.......but cool...fun.....good..cwazy....

Good times....

Indeed........



ok then.......

I am going to eat some home-made soup my aunt made and watch A Sharks Tale and call it a day......

oh and b4 I go.......

I am so....so... very sorry to a certain someone.....I didn't mean to hurt anyone......I truly didn't...... so I hope you will forgive me and well.......I do hope some day...that you will be happy.............and meet the person you are looking 4.



ciao

Right!

I received a nice chunk of change today......veryyyyy nice.............

I am going VIVA BABY!!

oh yes.....

Spring Break in Vegas.......

that's me.......with a friend......

groovy,great,and grand.........it shall be........

Well I am outy.........I have to finish up my Biology essay tomorrow........then its on to Political Science......
My GPA is as I sit........3.4

kewl!

oh .....and b4 I 4get.........

This new guy......we shall call him.......lemme see........hmmmmmm.......The Blonde Fox.....yes....I think that's what I shall call him here @ the 'ol bloggeroo......very fitting......

Oh ....I was saying........

well he is nice to work with.......

Professionally speaking ......................

of course.

uh hum



;)

ok then......



Hope y'all have a good weekend.......

I shall

ciao

Still kickin.....

Hi......

Coley is currently away from the 'ol Blog and will return when she has something interesting to comment on.....as at present there really isnt anything thats all that great to share....


Truly.........DULL


However.....as soon as something comes up.......I will return.....

Keep shakin....


Lata'

Train...Train....Take me on out of this town.....

I downloaded a song today by an old R-N-R band......Blackfoot...called Train,Train. I absolutely LOVE this song......as well as another one of their tunes......Highway Song..... o man does this shit take me back......I used to listen to this all the time when I was 16.....although with the Train song I used to change the lyrics a bit.......Train Train take me on out of Spokane.......well all my friends and myself used to add our own tidbits......I had actually forgotten about this band until today.......was listening to the radio and it popped on.... I went WOWSA.....so.... I thought I would share it with my readers out there....so if you are into good 'ol rock-n-roll I totally recommend it.........Totally dude!

;)


Ok ......so work was good.....but sad in a way.....as Fairy Grrl is moving to New York next month......her last day is the 28th.......and I will miss her......she is an excellent worker....she is great fun and doesn't get caught up in all the drama at work....which...seems to rampant these days......and....of course there was another episode of the drama tonight when Tissue got all huffy over something Fairy Grrl and I said to her.......we were joking.....well half-joking......but of course she got all pissy and yadda yadda.........fucking drama.......it is for the birds lemme tell ya......

I am still trying to set a date for me lil trip to Portland.....all I know is it will be next month some time......IT HAS 2 B next month!!......I am in need of a city and some fun..this small sleepy town is driving me out of my tree..........Portland.....fun in the rain......lol........but its all good........I miss it.....and my friends.......

Well that's all I have for the 'ol blog tonight........I am debating about going out for a few or staying in.........I may just toss a coin......what I really wish is that Binks and Jonny were just down the road like old times and we could just go out and dance and have a bitchin time......I miss that......I truly do........Next month........

I guess now that I think about it ....the Train Train tune hit me like it did.... as perhaps....... it applies to where I am at now.......another small town..another desire to GET OUT of the small town.... I am not a small town girl..I never was and I never will be......



ok then.....hope you all have a Fabulous weekend.......

ciao

Diamonds, Pearls and Keys......

Well I never made it back here to finish my update yesterday about the The cleaning Part 2 ......It went really well......the shots weren't as bad......the cleaning was a lot faster( allot of blood....) and all in all it was okey dokey......save for the fact of the "I just had a stroke numbing concoction" they gave me in order to perform the plaque attack...... the left side of my face was PAINLESS for about 4 hours......and this time the ribbing I received was from my always witty brother Mr.C.....he was making me laugh and smile and when your face is numbed off.....well it doesn't work right.....so when I would smile only half of my mouth would form a smile and so Mr.C would then imitate me....oh laughs.....I guess I looked like CartMan from SouthPark when he was trying to act mentally challenged for the special Olympics.......

fabulous.

Mr. C is so nice to me.......

* The dentist did inform me that I have a cavity....make that 2 cavities..... that shoudl be filled soon.....I then rsponded by telling the nice dentist man that he had to be wrong as I have NEVER had a cavity in my whole life.....so he had me mixed up with someone else.....he smiled and told me that he doesnt make mistakes and that I need to have it taken care of before it ...bla bla bla......


So my dental journey is not over....not by a long shot.....and then of course there go my bragging rights.....of never having a cavity......


dammit.


Lets see....... for the remainder of the day I finished an exam and started on my taxes....oh joy.......I hate taxes...I mean who doesn't......I have a friend here who works for H&R during the T season...and I guess I could have her do em......if I could ever get ahold of her.......Regardless.........I am trying to figure out what I can and cannot claim this year.....without having the black suits banging down my door.......fun stuff....

Moving On.......

I think I have mentioned on here that my musical interests are rather broad ......I think that would be a fitting description.........as of late I have been listening to Prince, Alicia Keys ,and .. Martina McBride....all extremely talented.... I pretty much like all of their material.....but the 3 songs I am recommending today are as follows.....so pay attention.....

1. Diamonds and Pearls "P"
2. I cant stop falling in love "AK"
3. How Far "MM"

Ummmmm...
If you listen to them in that order..... it sounds like a relationship is falling apart now that I think about it...so...feel free to mix it up a bit......unless of course .....you are in the "Break-up" process.......


Ok

I need to say buh bye and do my daily workout and get ready for the 'ol jobola......

catch ya on the farside

'lata

My monster

Here's my daily update.......and there will be more later as today is the 2nd half of the Cleaning!

Last night I watched Some Kind Of Monster.....The movie about Metallica .......and it was really good.......I was expecting some rock-n-roll insanity.....ya know....sex,drugs,and r-n-n......but instead.....it was a very well made film .... and the guys in the band were extrmemly professional and bushiness like.......I really enjoyed it.....I used to be a fan of their music and occasionally if I am in the mood..... for that negative aggressive rock...I will throw on one of their older CD's...but their newer stuff doesn't appeal to me...I have moved on to the Likes of Godsmack and Korn for my I HATE EVERYTHING ROCK!..... So I do reccomend the movie for all you music lovers out there.....tis a good flick....

I must be off for now.......I have to work out......shower.....take an exam.....and head to the BIG D....oh joy........

I shall return....

Have a good one....

lata'

Training Day

And the saga continues.....


I go into work today to find out that I am scheduled to leave @ 8PM....Which is a good thing......and then I find out that I am only scheduled to work for 2 days this week..Extremely good thing....as I hate working!!! Well I am then told that I will have 2 trainees..and wouldn't you know it.....they were both guys.....very cute guys..... :) so..... needless to say ..... the work Gods were veddy nice to me today..sending me some nice eye candy in scrubs.......

Ok then...

All was going well......and I was happy as heck as I was getting to leave early and I was just making small talk with the "guys" when I asked one of them what he was doing here and why he wanted to get into nursing and he says "Well, it sure as shit beats killing people" Ummmmmmm WHAT!?
Turns out he was in the Special Forces and has for the past 6 yrs been stationed in Bosnia and Afghanistan......He then proceeded to tell me that the Bosnia situation was/is a lot worse than is being reported in this country and that all in all it sucked shit.......Well I says "I want to thank you for what you did for our country, although I have to admit that I am against the war in Iraq" He replies "So am I....A lot of us guys are".......He then says " That fucking Bush is turning this into another Vietnam as I know of 5000 soldiers that have lost arms, legs, and are generally disabled" I go " WOW.....why don't we hear about this?" He replies " No one wants to interview guys like me....they just want to hear how wonderful things are and that the objective is being met".....I then say......." I would be happy to interview you"......of course he just laughed.......I wasn't laughing.......and deep down neither was he.......after that we made small talk about the price of oil here and he made the remark that gas should be 50 cents a gallon and so on........
I again thanked him for his service and told him how sorry I was for him losing his friends and so forth.......He said "Thank You" in the end I made a good friend and learned a few things........well.......I had a few things reinforced as I have always felt that the war is a farce and that we weren't being told the truth with regards to the casualties and wounded......

I know that not ALL of the soldiers that have served our country feel this way......but I also know that many of them do.......and it doesn't make them any less patriotic and it certainly doesn't make them un-American.......It makes them HUMAN. So I would like to take this time and once again say THANK YOU to all of the men and women who have served in the Armed Forces......Thank You for your sacrifices....Thank You- Thank You......and whatever your feelings are in regards to the war or current administration does
not undermine my gratitude to you....at all.......It just makes me respect you more.....

While I'm at it........I would like to again thank my new found friend.....Mr. Soldier.....for having the balls to say what he felt.....Regardless of who was standing in ear shot.....as trust me.....he had a few glares from a few eavesdroppers.....so ..........Thanx!

Ok then......I am off to watch Law And Order........I LOVE that show.......

I shall be back...


Peace

V day

Happy V Day!!!

So here it is....Hallmarks favorite time of year..... I have a bit of history for all those Die-Hard romantics out there........

One legend contends that Valentine was a priest who served during the third century in Rome. When Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than those with wives and families, he outlawed marriage for young men -- his crop of potential soldiers. Valentine, realizing the injustice of the decree, defied Claudius and continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. When Valentine's actions were discovered, Claudius ordered that he be put to death.

This one is my favorite...


According to one legend, Valentine actually sent the first 'valentine' greeting himself. While in prison, it is believed that Valentine fell in love with a young girl -- who may have been his jailor's daughter -- who visited him during his confinement. Before his death, it is alleged that he wrote her a letter, which he signed 'From your Valentine,' an expression that is still in use today. Although the truth behind the Valentine legends is murky, the stories certainly emphasize his appeal as a sympathetic, heroic, and, most importantly, romantic figure. It's no surprise that by the Middle Ages, Valentine was one of the most popular saints in England and France.


http://www.historychannel.com/exhibits/valentine/?page=history


I do love legends.........and I, myself.....am......... to some extent a sappy romantic......as of late I haven't been.....but usually I am.......anywayz.......I thought I would send a Happy Valentines Day wish to all of those Bloggers out there.....

Moving On......


Speaking of V day...."sounds like a venereal disease doesn't it?....Hey Sara!! Did you get that V Day taken care of yet????!"

k.

I have been for some bloody reason listening to the most sappiest music ever made....I know its due to me watching that damn VH1 show......100 worst love songs or somethin.......so I have been listening to Color Me Bad.....(I seen them actually) ummmmm Michael Bolton and get this.....AIR SUPPLY.....HAHAHAH.(I'm all out of love....I'm so lost without you)....I laugh my ass off .......but ...hey....I know all the words....Don't we all? I mean......hey kids.......... somewhere along the line these fools sold millions of records.....so we can make fun all we want.....I have a feeling their the ones who are having the last laugh.....


Tis my lil Valentines Rant....

I must be off......Its work out time......and then I am off to buy a new vacuum....I Finally convinced my brother that WE NEEDED a New Hoover........I cannot stand not having a properly working Hoover.......lemme see........then I am off to tan......and buy some nicotine patches.....this smoking HAS got to stop......I feel so fucking guilty every time I do smoke and its really gotten out of control since I moved here.......I mean I have smoked on and off for about 12 yrs......but the last 8 months have been the worst....I am up to about 6-8 smokes a day.....sometime more......and I can just imagine what I am doing to myself.......not nice.....so I am going to bite the bullet (or patch).....and quit............the time has come....


Ok then.....

Have a great day......


Ciao

Let it show

Tonight was an interesting night to say the least........I spoke with just about every friend I have back home . Lets see I spoke with Clogs,Jonny,Patti Anne, and of course Binks.......had a lot of laughs and the occasional serious chit chat.......I must admit it was good to talk with Clogs as I haven't spoken with her since I left in August.....seems she is in the midst of a separation with her hubby......but it seems that this is a good thing......so I wish her well. I didn't get to speak with Suzilla.......although I would have liked to........so I am hoping she will call me ASAP.....as there was an incident this evening that I am curious to see if it was in the end OK...I also spoke with Jonny and I was happy to talk with him.....as yet again I hadn't spoken with him since Aug. He sounds well and life is treating him well.........so all in all I did get to talk with most of my good friends.....even Patti Anne who informed me that she is sending me a package for V Day.....of course she wouldn't tell me what it is......I hate that........but I am grinning.....from ear 2 ear..... as I write this....... as getting gifts from your pals is alwayz a great feeling.......

Moving on....

work went well tonight....poor fairy grrl was a bit hung over but she managed to make it through the shift in one piece.......better her than me......o man do I remember the days of working with the rembrants of the night b4 lingering on.....the haze....the cold sweats......the cotton mouth......the unhappy disposition......o boy do I remember........and memories thankfully are enough to remind me not to consume the night prior to a shift......but when your 19 like fairly grrl.....well u really don't think about the repercussions........Its the fun your having that matters.......not the day after...... but isn't that way it is ..........

yip

SideNote
If this contact doesn't stop drying out and buggin me I WILL scream.

lil bugger

ok
Just had to get that out......


Well V day is fastly approaching ...........so for all the die hard romantics....... I hope Mr. Cupid finds ya........... and pokes ya .............in all the right places.....

;)


I must be off to bed........

But B4 I go........

I just want to send my love to all my buds tonight..... and let them know that I miss them ALL terribly.....it is so true that old saying "You don't know what you have until its gone" .......well that couldn't be more true for me tonight.....as since I have moved I have realized how.....so very much ....I miss my friends in Portland..........and talking to them makes me feel sad and happy all @ once......but thankfully...... I will be able to see them all next month when I return for a visit....... and that my friends is a great feeling....Knowing that no matter where I go...or where they go......we can always find the time to talk and on occasion......spend a few days together.....




Ok then......

that's all folks

nite

Working My life away

So here I am working on a Sat. I know I shouldn't bitch, lots of folks have to work on a Sat. but I feel as if I have paid my dues with working weekends.....I truly do..

So I just finished my workout and I need a shower........feels good to work out.....I find if I don't do it on a semi-daily basis I don't feel right...........

Well I best be off...........

Oh and for all of those folks who think I write in code...well tis not a code...I write in this manner to mostly protect my friends identity and I don't necessarily want to divulge my whole life for the world to read......this site is purely for amusement ONLY....

My amusement for the most part...

;)

Keep it real

ciao

Insulation Wake Up

I am sleeping.....Soundly.......having nice dreams....well I think I was........and all the sudden.......BANG BANG RATTLE RATTLE CRASH !!!!!
I wake up in a start. ..... "WA FU?" so....Sleepy eyed and Pissed off I open the curtain to witness a whole strew of men on my front lawn......seems they are here to re-do the insulation and clean the heating vents or some such shit. Well that's great......will help on the heat bill......but as for the timing. 7am?
Oh Hell no!
Needless to say I sleepy walked and mumbled myself to the couch and promptly fell back asleep until the 'ol alarm clock went off ........nice way to start me Friday.

So I seen that O'l Prince Charley is going to re-marry. Doesn't that mean he will give up the throne? Or being King? hehehe.......... lil royal humor there......Anyways........I love the Brits...I am what you would call an anglophile........One who admires England, its people, and its culture. So I shall be following this story quite closely......yes indeed.

I received a nice voice mail from a certain someone........ummmmm...seems I made a deal of some sort.......so I have to make things right and do my part sometime soon ......so.......I will have to work on that...

I must be off.......work out and post my web page...I really need to start watching the news again.......I have not a clue to what's going in the world...........I used to be on CNN headlines news email thingy.....where I would get all the current updates.......I need to get meslef back on that neat lil dealy..

ok then




Happy Friday to Y'all!!!

Ciao

Lack of communication

Things are about the same with me.......I am in the process of making a multi-media argument for my English course.....I have a thesis so all I have 2 do is sit down and fix my images and argument into a web page that I have been building for the past few weeks........pretty gravy.

I had a not so good conversation last night with someone.....Y is it that when you try to be as honest as possible and explain what you can and cannot offer it isn't good enough? I like this person a lot and would like to keep a relationship going, but I just cannot commit my entire life away @ the moment or be something I'm not at the present time. I am extremely stretched to the limits with school....work ......and taking care of the house and the brother..........so u know......@ the end of the day......... if I am not wanting to scream and kickfight the cat... I really just want to melt into my covers and sleep my life away..........I don't know why this is so hard to understand........Perhaps the age difference is a factor and the fact that this individual doesnt have any real responsibilities @ present......Maybe?

I don't know.......

wish I did.....I also wish this didn't have to be so flipping hard......cos I don't remember relationships being so difficult.....well one was........kinda......o...... fuckity fuck fuck......

ok ....thats me Bloggy 4 2day........thank you for letting me express me thoughts......I'll be here all week...


I must be off to the Job........I am working today, tom, and Sat.

can you feel the love?


ciao

Pet Peeves

Ok so I am driving around today and I was rather irritated so I decided when I returned home I would make a list of things that really BUG me....so here goes.......


(This list isn't in order of irritability......the irritability is all equal)



1. Writing emails to friends and getting no reply. I mean the whole point of writing an email is to basically ask "hey....how the hell are ya?" right? So if one sends someone an email...the polite thing 2 do would be to answer it.......well that's Coley's law of ethical email behavior.

* If I receive an email from someone and I don't reply.......then that basically means I don't want to have any type of communication with that individual...so for those who keep sending me email....and I don't write back...well......now you know why....

hmmmmmm now that I think about it.......perhaps Coleys law applies to those to whom I am not getting responses from......well....

F**K U2!!
;)


2. People who cannot drive......nor adhere to the laws concerning pedestrians.....or for that matter...... pedestrians who don't adhere to the law. Example- Today I was driving downtown and this older guy walks directly out in front of me and another vehicle with out even looking.....the crosswalk was about 30 feet behind him....he could have easily used it.....as that's what its there for......but oh no.......he just trots on out in the middle of the street........irritability level on that lil happening would be in the RED ZONE

3. Backstabbers- Individuals who don't have the balls to say what they want to say to your face and so resort to saying things behind your back........hey.... we are all guilty of this .....but I, myself...am one of the people that will tell you to your face what I feel.........I am finding this behavior is especially high in the nursing profession...as for the most part....... the % of female employees is especially high.......so of course the gossip level goes up with the % of female employees....

Just the facts Ma'am


4. POP UPS!- I have to say the RED ZONE isn't red enough for these annoying fuckers! I have tried just about every little software package known to Geek Dom......with no real relief..........they are extremely annoying........

5. SPAM- see above

6. Liars/Thieves- I don't think I need to elaborate on these types. They speak volumes with their despicable actions......

7. People who smack their food while eating- Ummmmmmmm.......tis gross and rude.....CLOSE YOUR MOUTH......I know someone in specific who I am directing this at.....he will sit and SLOP AND SMACK his food.....all the while........talking to you.......and your just sitting there with this look of disgust and disbelief on ur face......and he is oblivious to why.......
nice.....well...........no its not....

8. Slowness in people- I am naturally a very impatient person.......comes with being a Capricorn I suppose.....but if I am in line and the checker is standing around picking their ass or just slow.........I am about ready to climb the walls...........Pick up the pace people!

9. Clingy people- Ok I am not a very tactile person unless I am involved with you.....I don't hang on people and don't like being hung on......u know that one person in your life who just HAS to hang on you while talking to you or touch you or be in your face while talking to you. Like the Seinfield CloseTalker guy? I always want to say "hey...this is my space......and this is your space......don't invade my space and I wont be inclined to destroy your space". Thank you

10. Last but not least....Reality TV.....I mean come on!! They have a show for...... literally everything in life. I think it is a bit much........people need to spend a little more time working on their own "reality" and not so much time obsessed with people they don't even know ...nor ever will ......

So that's my lil list.......I know I am not perfect nor do I want to be......I enjoy having faults...well.....I mean I am glad to know I have them as it makes me human and therefore......I can work to become a better person......so in knowing this I will try and work on what Peeves me.......if people wont be so damn BUG!


I must work out and get some Homework done.....


catch ya later


Toodles...

So cool

I love my new Blog.....tis so fucking cool........it is it is...........

So I haven't updated anything on here in a few days so where o where do I begin?

Nothing much new has been a goin on in me life as of late to tell u true........last night after work I went out with N2 as her mother owns a pub in the Heights....so we shot a couple games of stick and called it a night.......I talked with lil shockeroo for a sec and we are on the same page as of today.....which is always nice....lemme see.........my freak cousin Toad had my Aunt call me over 8$ I owe him.......yes that's right......8 W H O L E dollars.......so I just dropped off a 10 spot and she glared @ me as if I was the anti-Christ.......Don't u just love it when the family takes shit to the extreme? I mean really.......lets call the Uunt so she can get me to pay a debt that I had spaced out...... so now everyone can think I am the biggest cheapscate and yadda.... yadda... yadda .......whatever.......lovely..........GROW UP TOAD!!!!!

Moving on.........

Work is work.......Fairy grrl came into work to help ME ( me......cos ......well its me....) out tonight which I thought was extremely sweet...as it was her day off.......and wouldnt u know it....she came anyway cos like I said.....it was ME..( Yes.....folks its all about ME)......

I got to see the car I want to buy....tis a sweet ride...but alas....I Don't think it is meant 2 be.......so I am still a shopping for some wheels........I am taking my time........I will continue to drive the Honda ......is my brothers but in my name so I guess its OURS..........for now.....

School is going really well.......I have a ton of work 2 do tomorrow..........but its a cinch.........just reading and a writin..........oh joy....

I finally got me hair done the RIGHT way.....went to the same gal as b4 and told her what I wanted and she complied and did a fabulous job.....so I am wayyyyyyyyy Blonde again......well for a few days until it calms down.......but I am happy.........

Lemme see ........what else???????

ummmmmmmm

well..........

hmmmmmmmm

I guess that's it........4 now

Oh

I love 5 layer dip from IGA.........well the local IGA here.........I LOVE IT!! I am eating it now..........ohhhhhhhhh yummy

ok then........

I best scat

I shall Blog again .........Real soon

Stay Tuned..

;)

Ciao

New look

Well wadda ya think?

I got the idea to change from a good friend of mine......Although I pretty much tweaked me new Bloggy background all by meself........

I like it.........pretty coo

I must take me leave.......hafta work out and go 2 work.......


peace,love,dove


ciao

The big Numb

I venture out to see the new Dentist this morning for Part 1. of my cleaning and boy wasn't it a hoot! Firstly I had new dental hygienist lady to whom I had to explain that I am the biggest wiener in the world when it comes to me toothies. She thought we were going to do the WHOLE cleaning all at once.......ummmmmm that would be a NO.....a big NO....so she begins with giving my the laughing gas.....at an extremely high level so..... I .......of course have this huge perma grin going.....she then proceeds to give me about 5 shots of the numbing concoction on me upper and lower gums and begins the cleaning......I felt NOTHING.....but the sound was Horrible........I guess 4.5 years of plaque does sound horrible when its being SCRAPED off of your teethes and gums.......
So she finishes and by this time I can no longer form a coherent sentence and I sound like that retarded fool off of Crank Yankers.....but worse.......so I say "sthank Thyou.....I sthank" and head off home.......where I am met by My cousin who of course gives me the bushiness telling me I look like I had a stroke and so on............I am extremely numb, but still feeling the pain of being attacked orally by dental tools......so My cuz gives my a pain killer and I head off to work.......great.......I cannot talk.....everything is really funny......and I am stoned.......fun fun.........so work needless to say was rather funny and pretty entertaining.....Part 2. of my cleaning isn't until the 17th and I requested that day off........smart move I believe.....and the smarter move I believe is to have the toothies cleaned every 6 months as recommends by every dentist in the country!

I talked with Suzilla for quite awhile last night and thankfully and FINALLY she is moving home........YES!! So as soon she is all settled I will be
heading home for a visit.........I cant wait....

I must end this now.......I have a hair appointment in the morrow......which I am hoping will be painless and un-numbing........although laughing gas would be a bonus.........well maybe not.......my luck I would be laughing and the girls in the shop would think it was directed at them and bla bla bla bla...........better to leave the laughing gas for the tartar police...


Ciao babes

Nomalization

Things have gone back to normal pretty much in mife...(mylife)

1. Mr. C and I finally talked.....well I bit the bullet and did the right thing...Apologized for being an ass and he accepted, BUT he did say I had a right to say what I said, just could have done it at a more appropriate time........so thankfully........all is well again with him and I. He picked me up @ work tonight and bought me Chinese for dinner.....way sweet.......so I feel oh so much better about everything....... 'sigh'

2. Work is still an ify situation........Tissue......she is this girl that is extremely BUG.......well she worked tonight with N2 and myself.....well she (Tissue) doesn't like me talking to N2 and so things always seem to be a bit tense....Y she feels this way I dont know....well I do as N2 mentioned a few things...but thats a different story...anywaaaayyyy......I told another co-worker tonight I felt as if I was back in hig school with all this melodrama goin on......she agreed......anywayz......I will be transferred out of there here in the next week or so......so that should be Coolio

3. School is actually plugging along.......I received an invite to go to Olympia on the Universities account to do a meet-n-greet type of deal........meet other students and prospective employers......Don't know if I will go ........its in Olympia.....but it was nice to have the invite.

4. My cousin and I are getting along mucho better these days.........him and I will be watching the Bowel together this weekend as Mr. C is spending it with Q Dog........I am making my home made Chili for the occasion.......should be a good time.

5. I am working out religiously......and I am finally liking the results....... ;)

6. Suzilla is no longer mad @ me for standing her up last weekend......I will however try and make it up to her by visiting ASAP!

All in all ........I would have to say things are OK DOKEY.....I am glad.......for awhile there it was touch and go.........and I hate that!

Ok then......


Side Note

* I feel as if there is a big emptiness though........

.......I am hoping time will make this easier to endure.

....if memory serves.........it usually does.. its just in the meantime.......thats a bitch...

yip

A really big bitch.....



ok then......


I must take me leave 4 now



tootles

Sidebar

My flippin sidebar is still all buggered up!!!

Thats really all I have today............

cept' people keep calling me and hanging up........and thats not nice!

Ok then

I am off to the jobola

ciao!

End Justifies the means

Today was a so so day........I went to work and after last week with all the drama I asked for a transfer which, I received......... and then wouldn't you know it everyone flipped out when I told them I was leaving..........but alas.......tis to late .....I am still moving to another sector, I need a break..

Today I had to say something to someone that I didn't mean......well to be honest I lied.........but I lied cos in the end it will be for the best.......but I hate having to do things like that........but sometimes you have to do things you don't like in order to make things OK for all involved........

Regardless.........it still wasn't one of my finer moments....

As for the ongoing Saga with Mr. C.....still the same......

I am going to have some sghetti and watch the tube and call it a night.....

Tom. Is Bush's SOTUA.....

'yawn'

ciao babes